Wednesday, 4 March 2009

Musicals and the Gay Gene

Jake Gyllenhaal
March 18, 2003

Arguments about whether there's a "gay gene" have roiled scholars for years. But as Oscar night approaches, I'm going out on a limb to declare that while we may never stop arguing about that, we can be sure of one thing: There's a Broadway musical gene, and gay men have it. Solid proof is on movie screens all over America.

Chicago, the most sizzling movie musical since Cabaret, is single-handedly reviving what was until recently considered a moribund art form. And no surprise to me, it was created in almost every sense by gays: namely, its writer, producers, and brilliant director. Pure coincidence? Puhl-e-e-eze. Chicago is just the latest bit of scientific evidence that while the homosexual hypothalamus may not necessarily determine sexual orientation, it sure knows how to tap its toes.

It's funny about gay men and musicals. Sure, the theater queen stereotype may be a bit overblown. But when you count up the sheer number of Cole Porters and Michael Bennetts, Stephen Sondheims and Noel Cowards, Jerome Robbinses, Jerry Hermans, Leonard Bernsteins, and Tommy Tunes, you have to admit that a velvet mafia has always had Broadway in its pocket.

And what's true onstage is just as true out there in the audience. Starting in junior high, boys blessed with the Broadway gene reflexively shun the gridiron to embrace Gypsy. And what happens? They're almost automatically pegged as gays-in-training. (I know--I was one.)

As we grow older, the gene manifests itself in strange and eerie ways. For decades phrases like "friend of Dorothy" were pillars of the secret code of the closet. Today's repository of this genetic lore isn't so much the Broadway stage as the big city piano bar--as gay an institution as the leather bar. There you'll find theater queens, driven by an impulse Freud never addressed, sitting around singing obscure songs from shows that closed out of town--and somehow knowing every word!

So Foucaultians can whistle against the wind. Homosexuality and hoofing go together like ... well, like song and dance.

Need more proof? Consider this. For the past couple of decades the musical was considered a dying art form. Rock overthrew Broadway show tunes as America's most popular music, and audiences supposedly didn't buy actors spontaneously bursting into song. Maybe. But it's just as possible that musicals declined because the vital gay link had been damaged.

AIDS swept away many of Broadway's leading gay lights, like Michael Bennett--people we needed to keep the genre going. And gay lib itself may have thrown a wrench into the genetic works. After all, an intense biological attraction to Ethel Merman and clever lyrics used to create the kind of bond for gays that sports do for many straights. Once we were liberated, our genes went all wooky, confused by a culture that produced disco, the gym, and the circuit. Cut off from what we knew best, gay men were cast adrift.

But biology is destiny, and the sudden success of a movie musical put together by a top gay team has profound clinical implications. The fact that writer Bill Condon, producers Craig Zadan and Neil Meron, and director Rob Marshall were able to cook up such a stunning reinvention validates musical essentialism and refutes any constructionist blather that they just "happen" to be gay.

After all, Chicago's gay creators report that they didn't fall in love with musicals because of gay culture or gay oppression, and they certainly weren't "recruited." They "always knew" they loved musicals. Rob Marshall reports that he "knew" when he was 4; Craig Zadan when he was 8. Sound familiar?

This, people, is the mysterious gay musical gene at work. Its fruits are now up on the screen to razzle-dazzle the clueless masses.

So on Oscar night I'll tip my hat to other gay-related films, like The Hours. But I'll be rooting for Chicago. Not just for what it is but what it represents. As Tevye says in Fiddler: Tradition! In this case, a major gay biological tradition, battered and bruised but still all-singing, all-dancing, and all-dreaming, despite changing tastes and the circuit and all that jazz.

Source: The Advocate, article by Gabriel Rotello

1,132 comments:

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Jackie said...

@
@ Previous post's comments
@

gay is ok said...

The DVD commentary for the new edition of City Slickers (why the world needed one of those is beyond me) features a juicy revelation by star Billy Crystal about the actor who played his 10-year-old son.

“He was always performing,” said Crystal of the lad. “He would sing from South Pacific and we’d all go, ‘He’s gay, he’s going to be gay.’”

Anonymous said...

After all, Chicago's gay creators report that they didn't fall in love with musicals because of gay culture or gay oppression, and they certainly weren't "recruited." They "always knew" they loved musicals. Rob Marshall reports that he "knew" when he was 4; Craig Zadan when he was 8. Sound familiar?

:)

Anonymous said...

Maybe Daniel Day Lewis is gay too!

Anonymous said...

^^^ Babblers never sleep! lol

Anonymous said...

I guess Ian said nothing interesting yesterday in his video!!!

Anonymous said...

Outside of Jake's fan sites, does anyone else even discuss him? A lot of people I talk to don't even know who he is, till you mention BBM.

^^ Upset fanboys or slashies never sleep either.
Have you taken Jake pictures off your wall yet?

Anonymous said...

Ian TV - I fell asleep and didn't watch it :)

Anonymous said...

Upset fanboys or slashies never sleep either.

Hello, this is OUR blog.

Anonymous said...

Upset fanboys or slashies never sleep either.

You are the only fanboy here :)

Anonymous said...

"Ian TV - I fell asleep and didn't watch it"
Ah ok lol

Jeff Wells has "Brothers" and "Nailed" on his Cannes list!

I wonder if he is not a bit too optimistic!It would be cool thought.

Jake said...

Wow!

Anonymous said...

"Jeff Wells has "Brothers" and "Nailed" on his Cannes list!"

Jeff Wells is a Jake fan.

Anonymous said...

Ian had technical problems yesterday. He couldn't do the show. He said on the chat he'll schedule it for another day with the same guests.

Anonymous said...

Thanks 5:09 AM.

Anonymous said...

Jeff Wells has "Brothers" and "Nailed" on his Cannes list!

Where? I couldn't find it.

Possible Cannes Deluge

Anonymous said...

Jeff Wells - Possible Cannes Deluge

Other English language titles ready in time include Terry Gilliam's The Imaginarium Of Dr Parnassus which features Heath Ledger's final performance, Philip Ridley's return to the screen Heartless, Jaco Van Dormael's $50m fantasy Mr. Nobody with Jared Leto, Neil Jordan's Ondine with Colin Farrell, Danis Tanovic's Triage, and Alejandro Amenabar's ancient Egypt epic Agora.

Anonymous said...

^^Gilliam didn't have a hit since 14 years. I hope for Heath, Glliam doesn't screw it up this time again.

I'd be nice if Jake's "Brother's" would be shown in Cannes. I wonder is Nailed finished?

Anonymous said...

Terry Gilliam has had many amazing films in the last 14 years, including 12 Monkeys - whether or not you think of them as successful and/or hits has nothing to do with the worth of a film.

Anonymous said...

Jeff Wells has "Brothers" and "Nailed" on his Cannes list!

Tough Choices

Yesterday an HE reader named Ephemerinko called me out on being too conventional in my choices about what to see at the big film festivals. "I'd like to see you take more chances, "he wrote. "True, you gotta kiss a lot of frogs, as they say, but when something pays off there's no better feeling in the world. Festivals are about discovery, not being force-fed what the studios want you to see. Your site would certainly be better for it."

He had a good point but he was also missing the particulars. Yeah, I could take more chances and kiss more frogs, I responded. I could do that. Maybe I should do that. But I feel at root that I have to try and see the films that have a real shot at being distributed and seen by Average Joes in Terre Haute, or at least seen by sophisticated ticket-buyers in New York and other towns that cater to people with actual taste buds.

That means seeing movies with brand-name directors (and by that I mean guys like Carlos Reygadas, Bela Tarr and Brillante Mendoza, even though their most recent films have been seen by maybe 1% or 2% of the hip moviegoing public) and actors and screenwriters with some distinctive history of accomplishment.

You have to make choices at film festivals, and you have to file like mad during the eight or nine days that you're there, which usually translates into seeing maybe 18 to 20 films, at best. 25 if you're superman.

There's a decent possibility that the following films will be at Cannes: Agora (no U.S. distributor), d: Alejandro Amenabar; The Road (Weinstein Co.), d: John Hillcoat; Brothers (MGM), d: Jim Sheridan; A Serious Man (Focus Features), d: Joel and Ethan Coen; Bright Star (no US distributor), d: Jane Campion; Whatever Works (Sony Classics), d: Woody Allen; Ondine (no US distributor), d: Neil Jordan; Forgiveness (no US distributor), d: Todd Solondz; Love Ranch (no US distributor), d: Taylor Hackord; Coco avant Chanel (Warner Bros.), d: Anne Fontaine; Nailed (Capitol Films), d: David O. Russell; Inglourious Basterds (Weinstein Co.), d: Quentin Tarantino. Plus Lars von Trier's Antichrist, Cristian Mungiu's Tales From the Golden Age, Gaspar Noe's Enter the Void, a new Michael Moore documentary about profligate Wall Street bankers, Fatih Akin's Soul Kitchen, Michael Haneke's The White Ribbon, Jim Jarmusch's The Limits of Control, Ken Loach's Looking For Eric, Terry Gilliam's The Imaginarium Of Dr. Parnassus, Andrea Arnold's Fish Tank; and Jean-Pierre Jeunet's Micmacs a tire-larigot.

I'm counting 22 films, meaning if they all turn up I may have to shine two or three. Which ones would you recommend not seeing if it comes to that?

By your standard I should ignore the Tarantino because it'll be opening in August. My response to that is, "Are you fucking nuts?" Maybe you'd say ignore Taylor Hackford's film about Nevada prostitution (if and when it shows there). But Helen Mirren won the Best Actress Oscar a couple of years ago and I suspect HE readers (and those beyond the periphery) would want to hear about this film. But if I followed your thinking, I would say, "Naah, fuck the Hackford and find a nice little frog that may surprise you and turn into a prince." Right? I get that way of looking at things because that's how you discover the odd pearl (it's true!), but it sure seems ill-advised right now.

Even the Gilliam film, which I suspect probably delivers in a nutso flipped-around way that even the most Gilliam-friendly critics will have a slight problem with, is of interest because it has the very last performance of Heath Ledger, which people are naturally interested in. Who wouldn't be?

On the other hand you hear things at festivals about films that you hadn't necessarily planned on seeing (not as a priority) but you go to anyway on a hunch. I hadn't firmly decided on seeing the public showing of An Education at Sundance, but I decided to go at the last minute because it was written by Nick Hornby and directed by Lone Scherfig. It turned out to be a very good call on my part. Last year at Cannes I decided I had to finish a piece I was working on rather than see Gomorrah. That was a bad call as it turned out.

But you're always juggling, always wondering, always on edge during festivals, always running with or behind your schedule but never ahead of it. You never see everything you wanted to see, and you always miss a couple of really good ones. Happens every time.

I'll never forgive myself for failing to see Anton Corbin's Control during the early stages of the '07 Cannes Film Festival at the premiere of Un Certain Regard. (Or was it Driector's Fortnight?) I just blew it and didn't go. I could have gone to the second screening but Robert Koehler told me not to bother. Hands down one of the best films of that year, and Koehler told me not to bother! I wound up seeing it on my last day there, at a market screening on the rue d'Antibes.

Again, let's presume that each one of the above films is shown at Cannes. Which ones would you shine, and why? I'd like to hear your thinking on this. Because I don't think you know more than what I know, and I don't think your instincts are any better than mine either.

Hollywood Elsewhere

Anonymous said...

Love Ranch (no US distributor), d: Taylor Hackord;... Nailed (Capitol Films), d: David O. Russell;

Capitol Films is Nailed US cinema distributor, right?

Anonymous said...

Page Six

A GUIDE TO 'GAYS' WHO AREN'T

SOME of the "25 Rich A-Gays Up for Grabs" might be surprised to find themselves on the list in Winq magazine. Some of the eligible bachelors might not even be gay. Marc Jacobs, David Geffen, George Michael, Lance Bass, Giorgio Armani are certainly out-and-proud homosexuals. But others don't belong in the new quarterly catering to "the huge potential of the worldwide demographic of wealthy gay men." Dapper Fiat heir Lapo Elkann was cited only because he was once "found dressed in woman's attire after a coke OD in the apartment of a transsexual prostitute." Hey, stuff happens. And a certain Mideast mogul made the list simply because he isn't married and "rumor has it" that the fellow in question "allegedly has a thing for males." Winq had better have good lawyers.

Anonymous said...

I don't think that Brothers will impress the critics much. It's just a Hollywood remake of a brilliant European film. The original is so good that I don't see why it was necessary to remake it just to suit a mainstream audience. Probably this new version changed all the interesting parts to market it better to the general audience and it will make the movie dull. The acting on the original film was superb. I don't think that an unnecessary remake of a great film like “Brodre” will create much buzz. Brothers will have to be really outstanding in acting and direction just to match the quality of the original movie.

Anonymous said...

The original script is great so there is a chance for a movie liked by critics.

Anonymous said...

There's a decent possibility that the following films will be at Cannes: ... Nailed (Capitol Films), d: David O. Russell;

Really?!

Anonymous said...

"I don't think that Brothers will impress the critics much."

Maybe , it's the risk with remake , but I just hope the acting is good and jim sheridan isn't a bad director!

Brothers said...

OSCARS 2009 FIRST PREDICTIONS

BEST PICTURE
Public Enemies
Nine
The Human Factor
Brothers
The Tree of Life

BEST DIRECTOR
Clint Eastwood, The Human Factor
Rob Marshall, Nine
Michael Mann, Public Enemies
Terence Malick, The Tree of Life
Jim Sheridan, Brothers

BEST ACTRESS
Michelle Pfeiffer, Chéri
Gabourey Sidibe, Push
Natalie Portman, Brothers
Susan Sarandon, The Lovely Bones
Helen Mirren, The Tempest

link

Anonymous said...

I read in an interview with the director Jim Sheridan that the original script of Brothers was changed to make it more "politically correct". For example, in the original film in one scene the main female lead leave her two girls unsupervised alone at home while she goes away during an emergency. I read that in the new film they had to add a scene where Natalie Portman’s character leaves her son (I think the two girls of the original were changed to one son) with a neighbour. They needed to add a “moral” action because the general public has to empathise with her character, so she can’t do anything questionable that can make the audience dislike her. It’s a simple change but it shows in which direction the new remake is going. They are making it plain and dull, just to suit a mainstream audience.

Jake said...

Tommy Cahill is edgy! Did you see my neck tattoo?

Ted said...

Dear Ted:
Loved the gossip/Toothy Tile paper. Thanks for the link and for keeping the mystery going. I for one don't really care who he is but do think it's a shame he's hiding, and that once out, society in general might not (probably won't) accept him in hetero roles. I'm also deeply saddened about his beard as she can't be in a very good place within herself. Tragedy all around.
—Kuchynata

Dear Tile 'n' Out:
The more tears we cry for Toothy the farther back he goes in his semi-well-dressed closet. Such a shame.

The Awful Truth

Anonymous said...

"I read in an interview with the director Jim Sheridan that the original script of Brothers was changed to make it more "politically correct"

There is an interview with sheridan???

Anonymous said...

Yes.

Anonymous said...

Posted on OMG by Special K about Leo and bearding:

One thing I was found amazing about Leo.
He had in his contract making Titanic, to include having Toby flown down on a regular basis on the studios dime.

Anonymous said...

I read Ted's comments from yesterday. Alot of bitter hot air signifying nothing.

Every closeted queen in Hollywood probably laughs at his silly games.
He can't out anybody, and they know it. Ted hasn't got the balls to go out on his own. He could. What's stopping him?

As far as all of these predictions regarding Jake's films, well I do remember all of the questions regarding Heath's ability to pull off the Joker.

Heath proved all of the scoffers wrong. This same kind of scenario has played itself out time and again.

I think some of you might want to hold judgement and see the films.

Unless of course, you just want Jake to fail.

reposting said...

Sheridan talks about Brothers and actors:

Feeling His Way

Jim Sheridan was 20 at the time, a philosophy major at University College in Dublin, Ireland. His family was eating itself up with grief and rage over the death of his younger brother, Frankie, three years earlier. His father was so devotionally focused on the memory of their departed saint that he mistreated the children who were still alive. Sheridan, the eldest son, traded blows with his father. Then he pulled a mirror from the wall and made his father confront his own face. “Look at yourself,” he shouted.

“I think that was the moment I became a filmmaker,” Sheridan recalls. “It was a melodramatic flourish, a weird act, but it’s what you do in films—a response to power that is not verbal but an action, a gesture.”
...

So performance is the key element in his art, but, he laughs, “I’m not even sure actors are directable. I think the more you know, the less you try to direct them. The more you just try to not impede.” The goal is to encourage spontaneous discovery in the act of making the film. Working with children on In America, he engaged them by letting them call “Action!” and “Cut!” With Daniel Day-Lewis (with whom he’s made three films), or Tobey Maguire, Jake Gyllenhaal and Natalie Portman in Brothers, his method of rehearsal is less about running lines than engaging in a Socratic back-and-forth, exploring what’s on the page with an open mind, asking and being asked about character and story points. He is extremely comfortable at being challenged.

“I invite a certain dissonance with the actor,” says Sheridan. “Most times, you want the actor to push back. Daniel is so focused, so organized that he’s like a balance for my chaos. He will just do it exactly the way I imagined it when I was writing, without having to ‘direct’ him. Natalie is a very classical actress, very sure of where she’s going—her only difficulty was her tremendous young age, being 26 years old and playing a mother of two, but she made the stretch. Tobey’s very controlled, a thinking actor. Great actors on film, you always know what they’re thinking. Jake’s a thinker too, but more like me, questioning everything, improvising. But actors generally have got to be allowed to push back, otherwise you’re just trying to fit them into a pictorial composition.”
...

Link doesn't work any more:
http://www.dga.org/news/dgaq_2008-1/feat_sheridan-008-1.php3?&section=news&oldsection=&oldpage=

Anonymous said...

Every closeted queen in Hollywood probably laughs at his silly games.

Bullshit. No one enjoys being in the closet.

Anonymous said...

9:28AM Not to be criticizing Jake but Heath was a superior actor and had a great range. To go from Ennis to the Joker and do both brilliantly is not a piece of cake. Jake is a good actor but he’s no Heath. Anyway, I’m crossing fingers for Brothers. I have big doubts about Nailed. :(

Jake said...

He had in his contract making Titanic, to include having Toby flown down on a regular basis on the studios dime.

Leo is The Man! *I hope he calls*

Anonymous said...

"Bullshit. No one enjoys being in the closet."

They enjoy being in Ted's papers, trust!

Anonymous said...

Thanks reposting

Anonymous said...

They enjoy being in Ted's papers because ...?

Anonymous said...

9:46, read again. The closeted actors are laughing at Ted's antics. They know he's full of it and can't really hurt anyone. It has nothing to do with their feelings about being in the closet.

And how do you know if they enjoy it or not?

Anonymous said...

And how do you know if they enjoy it or not?

Ask closeted gay men how they feel about it.

Anonymous said...

Ted's just a bully and a coward. Nobody is going to be impressed by his rants.

Until he grows somes balls himself and actually says who is gay, with the means to back it up, he's just another loud mouth gossip hack.

He wants other gay male actors to take risks with their careers, but he hasn't got the guts to do it himself.

What a hypocrite.

Anonymous said...

You're the hypocrite, 10:24, trumpeting "straight" relationships while insisting the gay ones remain the love that dare not speak its name.

Anonymous said...

"And how do you know if they enjoy it or not ? "

We talk about them !!

Anonymous said...

Ted and Ian , the knights of the truth !!

Anonymous said...

10:27 AM, 10:29 AM

This blog isn't suitable for young teenagers.

Anonymous said...

He wants other gay male actors to take risks with their careers, but he hasn't got the guts to do it himself.

Ted hasn't got the guts to do what himself?

ethel mermen said...

Why won't Ted "accidently" make a list of all the closeted actors. He could link it to his site or his "friend" site.

Anonymous said...

A list of all the closeted actors
Pffffffff E online won't allow Ted, there is 90% of hollywood in it!

Anonymous said...

10:26, learn how to read. I said nothing to trumpet straight relationships. I didn't insist that anyone remain in the closet.

I don't care what your sexuality is.

Let me see if I can make this simpler. No one who is closeted in Hollywood is going to care what Ted says. His ranting of yesterday makes him look desparate and foolish.

Ted wants actors to risk damage to their careers by coming out, but he is unwilling to take the same kind of risk to his career.

Let him lead by example. Let him name every actor in Hollywood who is gay and provide the evidence to back it up.

Let's see what kind of balls he really has. If he can't do it while at E, then go indepedant.

What's stopping him?

prairiegirl said...

Jackie, thanks for printing that excerpt/article from The Advocate. Enjoyed it.

I think he had a pampered life in many ways and this year with the death of his grandmother, friend, dog, parents' marriage will make him a better actor.

12:57, 3/4/09


Did something happen to Atticus that I didn't read/hear about??

Anonymous said...

False equivalency.

What's more, I am quite sure that it's up to an individual whether they wnat to beard or come out.

Just like it's up to an individual to believe that they are craven closet cases who rode a gay-themed movie to fame and now actively supress gay people by public bearding (and, by extension, encourage suicide among young people). I think Jake is a fucker for that.

Anonymous said...

What's stopping him?

The power of money.

01/17/03

Tom Cruise wins $10 million in suit against porn actor

Tom Cruise won a $10 million defamation judgment against a porn actor who allegedly told the French magazine Actustar that he had a gay affair with the actor, Cruise's attorney said. Chad Slater, whose stage name was Kyle Bradford, had said previously he never met Cruise and defaulted on the $100 million lawsuit in August 2001.

"I hope by defaulting, Mr. Cruise will finally get what he is after and I can finally start to put my life back in order," Slater said in a statement at the time.

The default motion did not indicate Slater admitted wrongdoing, but was an acknowledgment he did not have the money to fight the lawsuit and would not contest it.

Anonymous said...

"Just like it's up to an individual to believe that they are craven closet cases who rode a gay-themed movie to fame and now actively supress gay people by public bearding (and, by extension, encourage suicide among young people). I think Jake is a fucker for that."

It's the reason why Ian is in mission!

Anonymous said...

Did something happen to Atticus that I didn't read/hear about??

No, I'm sure poster meant Boo.

Anonymous said...

If Ted has proof he risk nothing!

Anonymous said...

What good would outing do? How would outing help anyone or anything?

sarah palin said...

So Jake is outed and then we all can get back to worrying about the economy. Everything will be right with the world.../ sarcasm

Anonymous said...

The script of Sheridan's Brothers is around and about and it seems to hold to the original very well.

Anonymous said...

Boo is DEAD? I thought he just got sent back from where he came because he was a pain in the butt.

Anonymous said...

We can't be sure sure, but I think Boo is gone.

reeking said...

Reese in Elle:

Big Love

An Oscar, a divorce, and a guy named Jake have made Reese Witherspoon larger-than-life

On boyfriend, Jake Gyllenhaal: “He’s fabulous. He really is a fantastic guy. Unfortunately, he’s not in the movie, so we can’t really talk about him.”

On the paparazzi: “Fascination is gonna die off. I honestly know it. But it’s just like I keep waiting and waiting, and then it’s just more tabloid magazines, and it keeps going. I don’t take a shower everyday. I don’t put on makeup everyday. I wear a lot of sunglasses, in case you noticed.”

link

Anonymous said...

Jake is "actively suppress gay people by public bearding" and "encourage suicide among young people"?

Honey, you need help.

prairiegirl said...

Thanks, 11:19. I surely hope Boo is not dead. I wish we knew exactly what happened there with little Boo. What a mystery.

Oh, those quotes from Reese in Elle are enough to make me spit. How fortunate indeed that he's "not in the movie". Saves you from having to say anything more indepth, doesn't it, Reese? Is fabulous supposed to be more intimate than supportive? And who says fabulous these days?

But it’s just like I keep waiting and waiting, and then it’s just more tabloid magazines, and it keeps going.

Give me a stinkin' break.

Anonymous said...

But it’s just like I keep waiting and waiting, and then it’s just more tabloid magazines, and it keeps going.

Reese Witherspoon is a shameless bitch.

Anonymous said...

Ted wants actors to risk damage to their careers by coming out, but he is unwilling to take the same kind of risk to his career.

Let him lead by example. Let him name every actor in Hollywood who is gay and provide the evidence to back it up.

Let's see what kind of balls he really has. If he can't do it while at E, then go indepedant.

What's stopping him?

^^ I agree, I hope Ted is reading this.

Yeah, take a chance Ted!

Anonymous said...

Reese, if you really wanted tabloid fascination to die, you would stop staging photo ops. I would bet a million dollars that once all that fascination with Reeke dies, Jake will be gone I'm a second. Can't have him dragging the Chin down.

Anonymous said...

Outing won't help anything. The person has to go thru their own life and their experiences on thier own. Hopefully a person can and will come out and show the world their pride. All types of gay people not just the fem. male.
Bisexual people also.

I agree, Ted wants the actors, especially Toothy/Jake to take a chance, so he should put his career on the line also and give proof of closeted gay people. There (will) be some backlash.

Anonymous said...

Gotta say, nice cover of her on Elle - almost didn't recognize her. She made some decent comments about her divorce.

Anonymous said...

If a person had a mind reader for just one day, one would be surprised of all the closeted gay, bisexual people there are in life we encounter. That's what I meant by more people coming out, not just the fem male.

Anonymous said...

She made some decent comments about her divorce.

She made up some good PR comments about her divorce.

Anonymous said...

Outing won't help anything.

ITA

Anonymous said...

What would you call her white garment? A "Husband beater" ("Wife beater-for-her")?

Anonymous said...

White shirt, no sleeves.

Anonymous said...

Same old full of crap Reese.

Anonymous said...

Ted C. is a coward.

And he wonders why Jake is laughing at him?

I'd laugh at him too.

Anonymous said...

I'd call it a white tank top. :)

Anonymous said...

Love how she says she can't talk about Jake because he's not in the movie. But hey Reese, when Rendition was out, you wouldn't talk about him then either, and he was in that with you. What a fucking ass two faced cunt liar.

Anonymous said...

But she'll talk about the divorce? That isn't in the movie either.

Anonymous said...

1:27 PM

Do you honesty believe Jake enjoys bearding, hiding and reading about it?

Anonymous said...

EWWWWW!!!SHE DOESN'T TAKE A SHOWER EVERY DAY???!!!
and she says it as if that makes her "normal"...!

agh, stinky bitch!

Jacob B. Gyllenhaal said...

I love musky women, makes me horny! Reese looks hot on the cover of Elle and she is all mine!!!

PS: I'm a major pussyhound and supported Bush and McCain!

Anonymous said...

Where's the part with not showering?

"Tank" is what they have in Iraq, hers is a "wife-beater"-for-her. ;)

Anonymous said...

1:44, I don't know what Jake feels about bearding.

And neither do you.

Anonymous said...

Where's the part with not showering?

On the paparazzi: “Fascination is gonna die off. I honestly know it. But it’s just like I keep waiting and waiting, and then it’s just more tabloid magazines, and it keeps going. I don’t take a shower everyday. I don’t put on makeup everyday. I wear a lot of sunglasses, in case you noticed.”

1:44 PM said...

1:44, I don't know what Jake feels about bearding.
And neither do you.


I think he loves doing photo ops with the beard, sneaking around with gay lovers and reading how wimpy and ball-less he is.

What's not to like?

phony said...

Reese Witherspoon’s Pity Party: “I Couldn’t Afford A Nanny!”

A little over a year after her divorce from Cruel Intentions co-star Ryan Phillippe, Reese Witherspoon has decided to let her agony out in the new issue of Elle Magazine. “[The divorce] was very humiliating and very isolating,” she says. Despite “fabulous” boyfriend Jake Gyllenhaal, she “still has moments where I’m like, ‘Nothings ever gonna make sense again.’”

Divorce does suck, but Reese’s pity party gets out of control when it comes to her first taste of motherhood. “When I first had Ava, I couldn’t afford [a nanny]. And it was so hard. I was out in Los Angeles, living [away from my family]. I really didn’t have any friends. And I had a baby. No one else who was 22 had a baby. I couldn’t go out.” Both she and Phillippe were making six figure salaries before and after Ava’s birth, collectively making $750,000 for Cruel Intentions alone (according to IMDb). That’s plenty for a nanny, Reese. Most young families don’t even have one parent making that kind of cash.

Just in case her ridiculous claim of poverty wasn’t alienating enough, she also wants you to know she doesn’t worry about her weight. “I’m made of cookies after the holidays. Everything inside me is made of sugar and flour and a little red wine—a lot of red wine.” White whine, too.

Scandalist

Anonymous said...

Gotta say, nice cover of her on Elle - almost didn't recognize her.

Photoshoped. Like all covers and beauty magazine photos.

Anonymous said...

Reese Witherspoon’s Pity Party: “I Couldn’t Afford A Nanny!”

LOL

Too bad fangirls are too stupid to see Reese's PR bullshit.

prairiegirl said...

Phew! Usually, I run over to OMG to escape a combat zone that has happened over here when there's a troll attack, but now here I am running over here to escape the mini combat zone that is OMG right now. For cryin' out loud.

Does Reese expect people to sympathize for her lean years in not being able to afford a nanny? You have got to be kidding me.
That woman is unbelievable. Who keeps giving her the cover of these fashion magazines? The sheer nonsense that comes out of her mouth is nothing I'm going to identify with nor admire.

But she'll talk about the divorce? That isn't in the movie either.

lol

Anonymous said...

Reese's shit brings out the worst in everyone.

Anonymous said...

What is Reese promoting?

Anonymous said...

What Reese says is no worse and no better than what comes out of most celebrities.

You don't like her, but you don't hesitate to read everything she says.

There are people on this board with worse issues than Reese will ever have.

Anonymous said...

What is Reese promoting?

Some animated movie for kids.

Anonymous said...

Reese described Jake as fabulous? Ok, Freudian slip of the day. Like I said before, only a true queen looks gayer with his beard than alone or with straight acting male friends. Even to his beard. It looks like Dame Yankee-Otis is making it's way into Brentwood. I wonder if she ever described Ryan as fabulous.....

Anonymous said...

You don't like her, but you don't hesitate to read everything she says.

For pure research purposes - to confirm one more time that Reese is indeed a phony bitch.

Anonymous said...

Some animated movie for kids.

Thanks. Is she getting her usual salery, 14 million dollars?

Anonymous said...

Reese Witherspoon's usual salary isn't 14 million dollars - that's the biggest salary she's ever got.

No, no one would ever pay 14 million dollars to anyone for doing voice over.

Anonymous said...

Okay enough Reese already.. but hang on, if you want to feel better about yourself take a look at these.

photoshop required pronto

Anonymous said...

Did you read OMG today? About what Austing did to some girls?

Anonymous said...

No, no one would ever pay 14 million dollars to anyone for doing voice over.

I bet she still got a shit load of cash.

Anonymous said...

Did you read OMG today? About what Austing did to some girls?

Who is Austing? No, I have no idea what he did to some girls. I don't go to OMG. Too many deluded fans.

Anonymous said...

Duh! Austing is Austin with a g.

Austin said...

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

"I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends"

...
Mr. Nichols - I call him that because I have
the utmost respect for Mr. Austin Nichols.
To be perfectly honest, I really didn't know
if he and I were going to get along when we first
met. He was too beautiful. And beautiful men frighten me!
But Mr. Nichols is a nerdy, brainy, eccentric man in
disguise. True story: I was giving Mr. Nichols a ride
home one evening, when a party bus full of young
women started hollering at us. One of the rowdy
things mooned us.....although Austin and I debated
as to whether it was a full moon, or and undies-on moon
(which is not really a moon at all.) Not to be outdone,
he instructed me to speed up and pull up next to them,
at which point, he dropped his drawers and delivered
the fullest of moons.

Wiccans could have conducted ceremonies under this moon.
Coyotes howled at it.
Cows jumped over it.

We had a good laugh, and then I dropped him off.
Later that night, he wandered into a bar and
happened upon the very same pack of girls who
had heckled us earlier. Coincidence doesn't exist
for Mr. Nichols. He is a magnet, and the earth is drawn to him,
so of course he met up with this group again. I believe
they bought him shots all night.

Perhaps they were Wiccan.

link

Anonymous said...

Dame Yankee-Otis

March 04, 2009 4:29 PM


"Dame Yankees" rotfl!

Jake said...

Not to be outdone, he instructed me to speed up and pull up next to them, at which point, he dropped his drawers and delivered the fullest of moons.

*Where did I put that spanking paddle?*

Anonymous said...

Reese doesn't shower every day? I hope she at least washes herself after going to the toilet after big business. If not, she's really gross. Didn't Jake say he showers 3times a day?
I shower every day, sometimes twice a day. I thought every normal/clean person does.

Anonymous said...

Who ever said that Reese is a normal person?

Anonymous said...

^^You have a point there.

dirt is best said...

5:18.. blimey, you make me think I'm a total grosser, for once I agree with the reekster, you don't need to shower everyday (2/3 times a week is fine), unless you're doing hard physical work how mucky/sweaty can you get. in fact, I've always been told that over washing can be unhealthy as you wash away all your resistance to germs.

Nair said...

No, that's too much use of antibacterial soaps that can reduce some of your resistance to germs.

I wish I could get by on 2-3 times a week. Sure would save on water, shampoo, & razors.

2-3 times a week. Is that a winter time rule of thumb? During the summer, is it increased some due to shorts/bathing suit season?

Anonymous said...

5:32 PM, "washing away all your resistance to germs" is 19th century talk.

Anonymous said...

A NY Times article recently promoted the idea that showering less the small child makes his/her immune system stronger by molding it from the contact with germs. Very natural and very healthy.

Anonymous said...

LOL!

Anonymous said...

Do you suppose the people at Southern Gothic spend as much time trying to actually finance and produce their movies as they do posting silly crap about Austin?


Who cares who he moons? And how old is he?

Anonymous said...

Babies Know: A Little Dirt Is Good for You

Training the Immune System

Wash in Moderation

Anonymous said...

“Children should be allowed to go barefoot in the dirt, play in the dirt, and not have to wash their hands when they come in to eat,” he said. He and Dr. Elliott pointed out that children who grow up on farms and are frequently exposed to worms and other organisms from farm animals are much less likely to develop allergies and autoimmune diseases.

Also helpful, he said, is to “let kids have two dogs and a cat,” which will expose them to intestinal worms that can promote a healthy immune system.

Anonymous said...

Well I hope all of these wealthy actors have bidets in their bathrooms, for god's sake. many of my friends do and they're not rich, just like to smell good.

Anonymous said...

our children should get worms?

that's so disgusting.

Anonymous said...

Austin is desperate to show he's attracted to women?!
What happened to Jennifer Whatshername?

Anonymous said...

A NY Times article recently promoted the idea that showering less the small child makes his/her immune system stronger by molding it from the contact with germs.

No mention of (less) showering.

"Dr. Ruebush deplores the current fetish for the hundreds of antibacterial products that convey a false sense of security and may actually foster the development of antibiotic-resistant, disease-causing bacteria. Plain soap and water are all that are needed to become clean, she noted."

Anonymous said...

Gypsy children are playing on top of the garbage and they hardly catch anything later in life. Ask anybody who knows.
A pampered wealthy child would die if left in the same conditions.
Who would have the best surviving skills?

Anonymous said...

Austin is desperate to show he's attracted to women?!

No, Austin was just playful.

Anonymous said...

"Wash in moderation"

dirt is your friend said...

5:55 sorry to be gross, but what's wrong with just using good old toilet paper. honestly being too clean is bad for you, and the environment (think of all that waste water and chemicals).

Anonymous said...

What happened to Jennifer Whatshername?

One photo op, that was it.

dirt is your friend said...

Also, Austin sounds like a fun guy, more than some people I could think of.

Jake said...

Dropping drawers is my kind of fun!

Anonymous said...

5:55 sorry to be gross, but what's wrong with just using good old toilet paper. honestly being too clean is bad for you, and the environment (think of all that waste water and chemicals).

If you go to the toilet in college or at work, you can't wash, but when you are at home, IMO, you should. Toilet paper isn't enough, you're not properly clean and sometimes you can smell it on people when you are close to them that they just did the big business.

Anonymous said...

^^I'm not 5:55 btw.

Anonymous said...

Racy Pics of 'Idol' Contestant Surface
PopEater
SizeAAA(March 3) - It's not the first time a photo has posed a problem for an 'American Idol' contestant, and it probably won't be the last.
Pictures of Adam Lambert, who made the show's top 12 last week, kissing another male have been circling the Internet. VoteForTheWorst.com has several. Lambert could see his 'Idol' hopes sunk, just like Frenchie Davis and Antonella Barba. Producers disqualified Davis in the second season after topless photos she had taken years earlier were found on the Internet.
And it seemed that the voters didn't take well to pictures of a scantily clad Barba, who failed to make the finals in season six after they appeared.
2009 AOL LLC. All Rights Reserved.

Anonymous said...

I really like my sex partner to be clean and clean smelling.

Anonymous said...

Pictures of Adam Lambert, who made the show's top 12 last week, kissing another male have been circling the Internet.

Adam Lambert Is American Idol's Most Out & Proud 'Mo Yet

It's hard to find something negative to say about American Idol contestant Adam Lambert — so we won't! The musical theatre wonder stole the show last week with his closing rendition of the Rolling Stones' "Satisfaction." He's the type of contestant who doesn't just sing, but performs. Lambert, also, is a big old 'mo, so we present these man-on-man photos (and performance videos) with admiration.

Queerty

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the Queerty link, 6:37. I voted on AOL poll asking about if readers think his chances on AI will be hurt by this. So everyone here can check that out too. Adam's the best one on the show, so I certainly want him to stay on. About time a openly gay contestant stands out. Thanks again, 6:37.

Anonymous said...

I really like my sex partner to be clean and clean smelling.
And sex makes you dirty and smelly again, so why bother?

Anonymous said...

And sex makes you dirty and smelly again, so why bother?

C'mon. One should wash before and after sex.

Anonymous said...

I guess some people enjoy rank smells but people smell pretty good when they're cleaned up

I dont even like to eat leftover food, and sure dont like to eat day old hah hah.

Dlisted said...

Reese Isn't Helping

When Elle Magazine asked Vanessa Lutz about her best homegirl Jakey Gyllenhaal, she said, "He's fabulous. He really is a fantastic guy."

Fabulous? Reese might as well have said that the bitch is feir-feir-feeeeeeirce. And that he's so glittery that she just wants to wear him as a dress while skipping along the rainbow trails left by his ass.

Reese went on to talk about how she's made of sugars, “I’m made of cookies after the holidays. Everything inside me is made of sugar and flour and a little red wine–a lot of red wine.”

This bitch might be gayer than Jakey. Might be.

Visit Elle to read the rest of Reese's interview if you give a shit.

Dlisted

Anonymous said...

Austin sounds like a juvenile.

How old is he?

Anonymous said...

29 next month.

Anonymous said...

Does anybody know if Southern Gothic has gotten any financing for this "Pedestrian" movie.

I actually visited the blog and gave up. All I could find was alot of gibberish regarding some of the people involved.

Who is directing this film? Who is supplying the financing? When do they start shooting?

Does anyone know?

I don't think I am asking for much

Anonymous said...

"Reese went on to talk about how she's made of sugars, “I’m made of cookies after the holidays. Everything inside me is made of sugar and flour and a little red wine–a lot of red wine.”

She's besides being a klepto also a wino? Ryan, ya need to take yr kids back.

Anonymous said...

29 - not 19, not 9??

Oh dear god.

Anonymous said...

Does anybody know if Southern Gothic has gotten any financing for this "Pedestrian" movie.

Why don't you ask blog owner(s)? They have the answers.

Anonymous said...

Flour, sugar and red wine: sounds like home made play dough. thats why her doughy look. and just wait a few years! diabetes, here I come.

oh it's very sad.

Anonymous said...

7:16 "29 - not 19, not 9?? Oh dear god."



You sound like you work in a bank. All about the numbers. Uptight much?

Anonymous said...

Ryan has his own drinking problems,pics of him drunk, stumbling out of clubs, yelling at paps and seen shopping with the kids with cases of beer in the shopping cart and pulled over by the police for speeding with the kids in the car.

Wine and sugar is nothing, Ryan has shared custody and believe me he doesn't want full, it would cut back on his partying.

Anonymous said...

“Fascination is gonna die off."

WTF?? fascination died a long time ago Reesey, If you & Jake didn't keep paying the paps for photo ops and your PR didn't keep sending crappy, lying BS to the tabloids, you would have fallen off the planet. "I keep waiting and waiting" my ass! Stupid bitch. At least if you lie, do it with some intelligence.

Anonymous said...

1st of all, children don't have the developed sweat/sexual glands adults do, that's why we use antiperspirants/deodorants and they don't have to until puberty. So them taking baths/showers 1/2 times a day isn't needed like how we need to.

That NYTimes article, disgusting. It proves 2 things: there's educated misinformed weirdos in every profession and you can't believe everything you read.

To the person who bathes 2/3 times a week, the problem is you can't smell yourself. You're used to it. Bet others smell you a block away.

Anonymous said...

"wine and sugar" LOL Reese sounds like one big yeast infection.

Anonymous said...

Stupid bitch. At least if you lie, do it with some intelligence.

No need, really - fangirls and tabloid readers are even stupider.

Anonymous said...

7:55, you sound like you have a phobia - for a healthy, monogomous couple, sex is neither dirty nor smelly, but natural. Have you even had sex? You can bathe together, after a "session". ;)

Anonymous said...

Human body is dirty and smelly if you don't clean it daily.

Anonymous said...

Ok, I have to ask the cleanliness ***** at 7:55:
How do you obligate your guy take a shower before having sex with you?
Do you uphold sex is he doesn't comply?

Anonymous said...

I think that goes without saying, unless you are a germ phobe. And why are you going up to people and smelling them? Perv.

Anonymous said...

^^My comment at 8:22 was for 8:15 -

Anonymous said...

Human body is dirty and smelly if you don't clean it daily.

IA.

What's the problem with showering daily? I wake up clean my teeth, eat breakfast, take a shower. Daily routine.

Anonymous said...

If your sex partner has any respect for you or is a half way decent person, s/he takes a shower or washes his/her "important" parts before sex.

Anonymous said...

Look at Ennis washin' his parts, his ears and sniffin' at his shirts.

Those ranch hands, their mamas taught them how to look after themselves.

Anonymous said...

Reese gives fierce head

Yeah right Reese wants to be pregnant again.

Before and way way way after

Anonymous said...

Look at Ennis washin' his parts, his ears and sniffin' at his shirts.

Those ranch hands, their mamas taught them how to look after themselves.


True that. He even took his toothbrush on the way to meet Jack. ;)

Anonymous said...

Yeah right Reese wants to be pregnant again.

I don't know why everyone says she has nice legs, her legs are ugly.

7:55 said...

8:12 said "7:55, you sound like you have a phobia - for a healthy, monogomous couple, sex is neither dirty nor smelly, but natural. Have you even had sex? You can bathe together, after a "session"."

I'm 7:55. How the hell did you get what shit you wrote from MY post? Me saying that adults need to shower once a twice a day is not phobic, had nothing to do with sex or saying sex was dirty and smelly.
You're either answering someone else, can't type/read the timestamp or don't *get* my point.
You need to get glasses, a better computer screen or take reading comprehension. Jeeze.

Anonymous said...

Oh Fuck you.

Anonymous said...

In the meantime, back at the farm, Chris F is posting pictures of himself half nekkid holding a dead skate, with his cute brother and cute sister and father, all holding, for some reason, sea creatures. this is from Fathers Day 07. I guess this is a kinda personal family type blog, and has no secret meanings for Jake fans.

whatever.

Anonymous said...

Have any of you dirt phobes read the BBM short story? Am I the only one who loved the description of the smells of that hotel room?

While I agree people should be clean, I like the natural smells of my lover, and too much cleanliness removes too much of those distinctive smells. For me I like a happy medium.

I love the thought of Austin mooning, I think it makes him sound like a kid in a good way. Being a stuffy adult is for the birds.

Anonymous said...

8:54, and you need some good OCD meds.

Anonymous said...

Oh Fuck you.

No fucking without showering first!

Anonymous said...

I bet Chris F smells like the ocean and tastes kinda salt. too bad he's gay.

Anonymous said...

I guess we have to agree to disagree on the showering issue.

Anonymous said...

ITA! And for you nosy assed types who need to judge other people's hygiene, I shower at least once or twice a day - but I love my bf's semen and it's smell, and he loves mine.

Anonymous said...

I'd love to give Chris a rub down with sea weed and then we'd eat raw clams that were nestled . . .
Im sorry, Ive Jake withdrawl aches. . .

forgive me, Chris, you're a really sweet patootie but I'd love to rub you down with sea weed and . . .

Anonymous said...

Have any of you dirt phobes read the BBM short story? Am I the only one who loved the description of the smells of that hotel room?

While I agree people should be clean, I like the natural smells of my lover, and too much cleanliness removes too much of those distinctive smells. For me I like a happy medium.


This is what I was ITA'ing with. Just the smell of his skin is heavenly. ;)

Anonymous said...

I like when the hair is freshly washed and the smell of it. It's also nice how people smell after taking a shower. I don't like too much perfume though, just a little is enough. What grosses me out is when people don't shower, but put on deos or perfume.

nosy said...

loving bodily fluids and loving them when they're a couple days old - two diff'rent things.

Anonymous said...

geeeze this conversation is getting me hawt! don't stop now!

Anonymous said...

I wonder how Jake's chest smelled when Heath was kissng/smelling it, or how Heath's hair smelled when Jake was smelling it? Do you think they liked their smells?

Anonymous said...

Who is talking about not washing for days on end? LOL I don't think anybody would find that appealing?

I'd better shutup before I have to wash out my mouth with soap.

Anonymous said...

Several days is too much, but I don't mind say, part of a day. But depends upon the person, I think we've all known people who smelly pretty ripe after just a few hours. And agree that people should not try to cover up those smells by dumping on the cologne.

Anonymous said...

"8:54, and you need some good OCD meds."

I guess you consider taking a shower once a day an Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder? If I tell you that I brush my teeth at least twice a day are you going to suggest I be committed to an insane asylum?

Anonymous said...

Do you think they liked their smells?

Yes.

BBMt Motel

Anonymous said...

Do you floss twice a day as well? I do. If you don't, then I'd suggest commiting you.

Anonymous said...

To the cleanliness freak:
Are you pretending your lover has to have an enema before sex with you?

Anonymous said...

BBMt Motel

I love this picture. I'll forever think they'd have made one of the best couples ever. Neither in film nor in RL it was meant to be. Oh well. ;)

Anonymous said...

Do you floss twice a day as well? I do. If you don't, then I'd suggest commiting you.

Once a day before cleaning my teeeth in the evening.

Anonymous said...

Ennis didn't mind Jack's behind, without a klisma.
I also didn't see Jack asking before if Ennis did clean thoroughly his uncut thing-y. (You know they get dirty if not cleaned and scrubbed daily.)

Anonymous said...

"To the cleanliness freak:
Are you pretending your lover has to have an enema before sex with you?"

Depending on the time of day.

& Im not a cleanliness freak. again, its often just common courtesy.

Anonymous said...

That's something I hate - smokers breath a and people who don't floss. Smokers really stink. And 9:33, I shower twice a day, any other questions, like what brand of soap I use? I meant that people who are too preoccupied with other's people's habits may need professional help and OCD meds. Think you should follow your own advice and step up the reading comprehension, recheck your times stamps, or just plain STFU. Have a nice night! :)

Anonymous said...

"I also didn't see Jack asking before if Ennis did clean thoroughly his uncut thing-y. (You know they get dirty if not cleaned and scrubbed daily.)"

he didnt have to ask because he SAW Ennis washing his dick when he came back to camp.

Anonymous said...

O those guys were so young Im sure they both smelled sweet as the mountain air -

hey and I recall Jack washed his jeans the mornnig after.

Anonymous said...

hey nice break from talking smelly ole Reese. thanks!

g'night!

Anonymous said...

Yes, but we never actually see Jack washing his behind before sex.
(What a sight would have been.)

Anonymous said...

Yes, but we never actually see Jack washing his behind before sex.

LOL.

Anonymous said...

A real sheepherder in Wyo.

link

Lorenzo Cortez Vargas lives in a 5-foot-by-10-foot trailer without running water, a toilet or electricity.

No little boyz from Hwood there.

Anonymous said...

And he probably smokes!

prairiegirl said...

Yes, but we never actually see Jack washing his behind before sex.

Lol. Seems like that's a scene that should've been written in.
Where were you, 21:59 when that screenplay was being written?

Anonymous said...

"but I love my bf's semen and it's smell, and he loves mine."


Ok, It's official. This (is) a Gay fanboy blog. Didn't really know, now I do. It's no wonder the harsh, mean upset attitudes towards Jake and every thing he does, and especially Reese even though you boys really hate her you travel around the net searching for interviews (interesting). Reese upset the apple cart. (took away the Jake fantasy) Are the Jake pictures still hanging over the beds? It's time to take them down, he won't mind, and you shouldn't either!

Anonymous said...

^^No, it's not official - you got it wrong - I was speaking as a female. Don't blow a gasket!

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