Sunday, 19 October 2008

Every Day is Toothy Day

October 7, 2008

Dear Ted:
You so often told us that Toothy Tile knows he's Toothy and that he's proud of it. What about Gray Goose, is he a proud one, too?

Dear Smile Like You Mean It:
Hardly. Grimacing through it all.

Dear Ted:
Who is the most loving, sweetest and hottest hubby: Toothy's or yours? Is Baby Tile old enough to walk?

Dear Tile-icious:
Mine. No.

Dear Ted:
If Jake and Reese are just PR buddies, then as far as I can tell, he hasn't dated anyone since he broke up with Kirsten Dunst back in 2005. Is he that picky?
—Jill, M.E.

Dear Dump or Dunst:
Maybe he didn't date KiKi, either.

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth

October 11, 2008

Dear Ted:
Would you answer the million-dollar question: Is Toothy Tile gay or bisexual? How about Gray Goose? What is the real nature of Toothy's relationship with his beard?

Dear Tricky Tooth:
You mean the one on his face or the one on his publicist’s speed dial? Gay as my vocabulary, darling. Ditto on the real love in Toothy’s life.

Dear Ted:
I have so many questions for you! Is Daniel Craig Toothy Tile? Is Obama going to win? Will Brad Pitt pull a Woody Allen and marry Zahara 18 years from now?
—Jenna K

Dear Lot to Handle:
No. Hopefully. Better not.

Dear Ted:
Does Toothy Tile's GF/beard know that he's T.T.? Or if not, that he's gay?
—Pat, Chicago

Dear Loose Goose:
Enough with Toothy! He’s not even that good of an actor, what’s all the damn fuss, already? And, of course, Toothy's woman knows he's Toothy, as well as his mattress persuasions, duh. She's been down this road before, think she'd be over the swinging studs by now, but whatever.

Dear Ted:
You're so jaded about celebrity relationships. You seem to think like there's an expiration date to these couplings.

Dear Downer:
No worries, every day is Toothy Day here at A.T.!

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth