Sunday, 17 August 2008

Mr. and Mr. Tile

August 13, 2008

Dear Ted:
What describes Toothy Tiles's situation better: "Single Tile," "Mr. and Mr. Tile" or "Family Tile"? Please, could you include clues and hints more often about him? What happened to that great idea to dedicate one day a month to only Toothy questions?

Dear Multiple Choice:
Family Tile. Don’t remember committing to one day a month trying to ferret out T.T.’s identity. Still, don’t think that’s enough for my taste.

Dear Ted:
I so wish that you would/could reveal Toothy Tile. In the meantime, is Crotch Uh-Lastic Josh Hartnett? He is brooding, boyish and certainly crusty.
St. Louis, Mo.

Dear Crotch Catch:
So close (much more so than Mr. H. would like, I’m sure). But alas, wrong dude. Think more talented. By, like, a lot.

Dear Ted:
Greetings from the great Football Hall of Fame city! Love your column and read it ravenously at lunchtime...great escape! I was just wondering if Crotch Uh-Lastic could be Kevin Spacey? And maybe Toothy Tile is John C. Reilly?
Canton, Ohio

Dear No Touchdowns:
Keep trying, babe, way off on both. Think more good-lookin’ than either Kev or Johnny C., sorry fellas, it’s a superficial world out there.

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth


August 15, 2008

Dear Ted:
Still getting used to the blog but still lovin' the goss. I'm stumped by your new addition, Crotch Uh-Lastic. I'm hoping it's not my favorite hunk-a-licious Christian Bale. Everything you say makes me think of him—the S.O. suddenly appearing, the dark, brooding roles, artsy films, and he has gone for similar roles as Toothy Tile. Please say it ain't him.

Dear Cat Woman:
Poor old C.B. has enough drama in his life at the mo to be Crotch. Think slightly less fabulously paid.

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth