Wednesday 30 September 2009

Prince of Persia: The Story of Jake's Pecs

Lego Prince of Persia
Jake Gyllenhaal
September 28, 2009 by Ted Casablanca

We seriously didn't think Jake Gyllenhaal's campy costume for the upcoming Disney flick Prince of Persia: The Story of Jake's Pecs could get more guffaw-worthy (despite the pretty damn doable bod itself, minus overdone Fabio trappings), but then we saw J.G.'s Lego action figure. Sorry, folks, we don't even get a pint-size superhero-esque action figure of chiseled Gyllen-hon to play with, but this supercute and totally harmless plastic children's toy instead? And it pretty much captures the doability—or lack thereof—of present-day Jakey perfectly.

Oh no?

Try as we might, we just can't drool over a guy who's become as vanilla as the soy latte we always catch him sipping alongside Reese. Manically manicured biceps 'n' abs in themselves don't make a real man, and neither does prancing around in a supersilly getup with an even more impractical piece of arm candy. We so know Gyllen-babe would rather jump back into indie film land and do his less pumped-up, more moody thing. He's so damn good at it, remember?

Is being a big, sweaty H'wood He-Man that important to ya, Jake? 'Cause this Lego figure almost pulls it off better than you have so far.

Please. For the sake of those three of us left who still swoon over ya, Jake, replace the gym and the GF with your true self. It was the hottest thing round there for a while.

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth, Would You Do Jake Gyllenhaal With These Plastic Abs?

2,161 comments:

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Ted said...

Blind Vice: Toothy Tile Trading Coke for Cracking Up?

This is not a joke: Poor closeted movie star Toothy Tile, last caught pitifully fooling around with blow and broads, is more recently causing his friends to worry something fierce about his head.

And I don't mean the kind he prefers getting in West Hollywood parking lots.

As our beloved Mr. T's same-sex desires (and née partnership) have been cast as far back in the closet as Kevin Spacey appears to be, Toothy's extremely tight band of friends are fretting for the fella's emotional well-being and rightfully so.

"We're wondering when he's going to crack," said one of the slightly lesser-inside chums to the notoriously private actor. "I keep hearing from everybody else that he's about to pop, but it's weird, whenever I see him, he acts like everything's cool. I think he only shows that side of himself to a couple of people."

And those people are telling other people who are telling me:

•Toothy's current and arranged girlfriend is starting to "really get on his nerves," particularly when she cleans up after Toothy, who's apparently a bit of a clumsy eater.
•Toothy's getting fed up with having to keep his (currently reinvented) relationship with Grey Goose in the dark and is threatening his publicists and hangers-on with outing both himself and Grey which would then, ironically, ruin Grey's own beard relationship, not that anybody really cares, so never mind.
•Toothy's been heard complaining to his advisers that the Biz angle they've chosen for him is not exactly panning out, so "what has it been for?," as Toothy has cried.
•Toothy's so frustrated by being a nonperson, as it were (and how he deems it, quite unlike many other fellow Hollywood celebs who are perfectly happy to sell their empty souls to the tabloid devil), he's become unnaturally obsessed with his abs, a subject years prior, when he was happier with Grey, he didn't give an ef about.

Toothy, Toothy, Toothy!

Please give up this hideous fake life while you can and before you turn into one of these six-packed prima donnas who have about as much to say in life as does Kristin Cavallari. We know the real Toothy's dying to come out.

Let him!

(Hey, Neil Patrick Harris still has an OK gig, ya know).

Blind Vice

Jake said...

Toothy has competition now.

Fuck!

Anonymous said...

2:04, I guess Austin is happier with Sophia (even though it's faux to promote the show), but Jake probably ain't too happy with his arranged gf.

Anonymous said...

Ryan was friends with Jake. He called the situation bizarre but he probably has seen stranger things then this. He must have to regularly explain to the the kids that their mother long ago traded her self respect and credibility for fame and glory so this is just one more thing. I doubt he likes it but what would he gain by rocking the boat?

Anonymous said...

Does anybody get what Ted is implying with "nee partnership" and "currently reinvented relationship"?

Anonymous said...

Ryan loves his kids and therefore can't trash the bitch.

Anonymous said...

2:04, or maybe there isn't any relationship to hide, although there’s no doubt in my mind that Jake is gay. Ted is still running with the TT & GG story but in reality I don't think there's anything there anymore. JMO

Anonymous said...

Ryan turned his ladybug tattoo (the one he got for Reese) into a Scorpian. That says it all.

Anonymous said...

LOL, he learned his lesson the hard way!

Anonymous said...

I still wouldn't call a few outings with Sophia bearding, so I think one of the reasons Austin looks happier is that he's really not out there faking a life and changing what he does, other than not being seen with Jake.

And if Jake is such an emotional mess, then maybe being isolated from Austin is just making it worse. I think Jake is just more fragile than Austin, who seems like an easy-going guy.

Plus Austin's career seems to be doing just fine, unlike Jake's.

Anonymous said...

His (currently reinvented) relationship with Grey Goose = they are currently in a good place?

Anonymous said...

"nee partnership"= former partnership with Goose?

Anonymous said...

Just friends?

Anonymous said...

née
adjective [always before noun]
a word used to introduce the family name that a woman had before she got married
Margaret Hughes, née Johnson

Anonymous said...

"nee partnership"= former relationship with Goose?

"currently reinvented relationship"= being just friends now?

"become unnaturally obsessed with his abs, a subject years prior, when he was happier with Grey, he didn't give an ef about"= He was happier when he was with Goose. It could imply Toothy is now without Goose.

Anonymous said...

So, is the Chin going to be flying on her broomstick to Pittsburgh with Flynet this weekend so she can give us 100s of pictures to prove everything is okay?

Anonymous said...

née - Austin and Jake are just friends now or they got married :)

Anonymous said...

What Ted writes is quite contradictive.

Anonymous said...

If "currently reinvented relationship" means they are just friends now, then Toothy "threatening his publicists and hangers-on with outing both himself and Grey" and "become unnaturally obsessed with his abs, a subject years prior, when he was happier with Grey, he didn't give an ef about" could mean that Toothy wants to win Gray Goose back?

destiny said...

Urban Dictionery says nee is Dutch for no, also slang for never, no, not any.

And then there's this definition which cracks me up:

look at; using the chin as a pointer

Anonymous said...

And those people are telling other people who are telling me

Hm. I feel Ted knows as much as Lainey, Perez and other gossipers know, namely not much. Sometimes they are right, but many times it's just hearing something (true or false) and adding a personal interpretation.

Anonymous said...

if "nee partnership" means "no partnership" then "currently reinvented relationship" means that they are just friends now and "when he was happier with Grey" means that Toothy was happier when he was in a relationship with Goose and not now that they are just friends.

Anonymous said...

"Toothy's getting fed up with having to keep his (currently reinvented) relationship with Grey Goose in the dark and is threatening his publicists and hangers-on with outing both himself and Grey"

I don't believe it. Jake wants to be A-list and knows well that if he came out now Disney and the beard would make sure he's finished. He’s much too ambitious to come out especially now with a big budget popcorn movie like POP less than a year away. Please, Ted!

Anonymous said...

Maybe the threats are just to get out of the bearding and not being seen at all with Austin??

Anonymous said...

"I feel Ted knows as much as Lainey, Perez and other gossipers know, namely not much."



I'm starting to think the same thing :(

Anonymous said...

"Maybe the threats are just to get out of the bearding and not being seen at all with Austin??"

I thought there was a bearding contract? How can Jake get out of it with simple threats? Jake's not dumb, he knows Disney would eat him alive if he came out now. Why would he care about not being seen with Austin, he didn't seem to have a problem with it for two years? Now suddenly before POP is out he wants to be seen with Austin? Sorry but what Ted says makes no sense, I’m not buying it.

Anonymous said...

The blind item is about Toothy not being in a good place emotionally and about to crack. I think the way it's written implies that it is not only because of the bearding and his career but because he is no longer in a relationship with Grey Goose and it's affecting him. His threats to out himself and Goose could be his own emotional crisis talking and not a real rational action he'll make.

Anonymous said...

IMO the "And those people are telling other people who are telling me" is a strategy by Ted to make the sources remain intentionally vague. You can bet your ass TT and his handlers read AT. A "I heard it from so-and-so who heard it from so-and-so" leaves a pretty big berth in the game of "Who's the friend who's blabbing?" and is a lot harder to figure out.

Anonymous said...

Could be that GG left him because of his cold feet on coming out, bearding and spending all of his time with the General, and Jake thinks if he stops all that he'll come back.

Also, let's not forget PoP was supposed to come out this year, Jake probably never imagined it would go on this long, or be this difficult. Plus it did nothing for Jake's career, turned him into a joke and almost a has-been with the fans.

Anonymous said...

Ted could have just said, "my sources told me." IMO.

LMAO said...

LOL if the TT and GG breakup is true and Jake got stuck with a baby!

Anonymous said...

I doubt very much there is a baby.

Anonymous said...

Some poor Gyllenhaalics who, it seems, hoped Jake would fall for Anne and dump Chinny. So despereate for him to dump her.
As a poster alreay said, the Reeke train seems unstoppable at the moment, whether they are really dating or faking. Either way, Reeke won't break anytime soon.

Anonymous said...

Of course the bearding won't end anytime soon, there's too much at stake for all parties involved. I take what Ted says with a BIG grain of salt, after all he said Jake will come out and shortly Reeke began.

Anonymous said...

Ted isn't saying he's going to do anything, just that he wants to and is supposedly an emotional mess.

Jake hasn't had his balls in two years now, I seriously doubt he suddenly grew a pair.

Ted said...

And then there's this definition which cracks me up: look at; using the chin as a pointer

Fuck! I didn't mean that!

Anonymous said...

"I feel Ted knows as much as Lainey, Perez and other gossipers know, namely not much."

Please. Lainey is selling Reeke and Perez "changed his mind" about Jake being gay - they are playing for PR team.

Anonymous said...

Duh, I just realized the TT abs mention relates back to Ted's Jake post, which is the subject of this post.

Anonymous said...

:)

Anonymous said...

The blind item is about Toothy not being in a good place emotionally and about to crack.

"I keep hearing from everybody else that he's about to PoP ..."

Anonymous said...

His threats to out himself and Goose could be his own emotional crisis talking and not a real rational action he'll make.

ITA

Anonymous said...

Jake hasn't had his balls in two years now

That shouldn't be a problem:

Get big nuts - order online!

t said...

SherlockHomiee: They're filming Love & Other drugs and Unstoppable in Pittsburgh right now. Right outside of my building. Imma creep on that...
about 3 hours ago

Anonymous said...

^^

I'm not saying those twist are all fake but i do find them very odd. How can so many random people know about the filming of this movie, with the right title and all? It's not like they are filming James Bond or some Jen Aniston's shit that everybody is always aware about.
LAOD has not been to much publicited yet.

Anonymous said...

Pittsburgh isn't a big city and I think people are impressed to see Jake or Denzel Washington walking down the street.

Brothers said...

Clifton Collins Jr. interview
...
Q: Brothers looks like a pretty big award contender, so can you talk about your experience making that and working with Jim Sheridan?

Clifton Collins Jr.: Oh my God, yeah. He works very differently and I just wanted to know the magic of Jim. Have you heard the commentary on In America?

Q: No, I haven't. I'm just not a big fan of commentaries.

Clifton Collins Jr.: Well, I highly recommend it because it's just as engaging, if not more engaging than the actual movie. It's loosely based on his life so he talks about these things and you're like, 'My God, this guy went through some sh*t.' Life is truly stranger than fiction and if some of the stuff he would've put in the movie, you just wouldn't believe it. That's the stuff you get to hear with Jim doing it. I watched In America after working with him, I had already seen it two or three times, but then I put on the commentary and it was like watching a whole new movie all over again. It's truly one of those special, special commentaries. You know, there are some commentaries that you shouldn't really waste your time on, but this one is definitely worth it. But working with Jim, I just wanted to collaborate with him and work with him and that's what he does. He's a big collaborator and he's all about the truth, and the truth of the scene and the honesty in it.

Working with Toby (Maguire), he's an old friend and (Jake) Gyllenhaal, who I got to know during the Brokeback and Capote days, you know with doing the Oscar circuits and stuff. That, Sam Shepard and Natalie Portman, who I've had a crush on for I don't know how long. She's beautiful and talented and smart and really precious, truth be told. She's a special girl and it was a dream job. It was hard, emotionally, in a lot of different ways. Brad Renfro passed and I thought about Heath (Ledger) passing, literally minutes before they shot my big close-up when I'm debriefing Toby. It was a tough thing just to keep it together and try to act and to have all this new dialogue that Jim, Toby and myself came up with. But I have high hopes for it. It's an incredible script and it's based off a Danish film, which I've heard is amazing. I haven't had a chance to see it.

Q: Yeah. There hasn't been a whole lot of Oscar buzz for anything this year, really, so that seems like one that could be standing out.

Clifton Collins Jr.: Have they started to talk about it?

Q: Well, it's not that people are starting to talk about it, but when I, myself, have been going through everything, there hasn't been a lot of buzz for award-worthy movies and that just seems like one that would stand out for the Oscars.

Clifton Collins Jr.: Yeah, I really hope so, man. Did you see the trailer?

Q: Oh yeah.

Clifton Collins Jr.: Pretty powerful, huh?

Q: Yeah, and especially after seeing that, I thought that would be one that would definitely stick out for consideration.

Clifton Collins Jr.: Yeah. You know the saying, from your mouth to God's ears. Everybody put their heart and soul into it and I cried my eyes out on more than one occasion, just doing military research and all this stuff. Yeah, it definitely deserves and we definitely put our heart into it.

MovieWeb

Anonymous said...

The twitterer "SherlockHomiee" tweeted about Jake/LAOD before, so he's aware and knows the name. (the reason I remember him is I love his twitter name, "SherlockHomiee" ~ he a homeboy dude, lol)

Anonymous said...

"nee partnership"
"currently reinvented relationship"


Doesn't necessarily means they're broken up. If there's a BT, and IMO there is (Ted swears there is, has said so plainly, and the footprint), all relationships change and get "renegotiated" when children arrive. Also Ted said previously they were not broken up, which leads me to believe that this latest reference has more to do with evolving the parameters of the relationship from a hot love affair (partnership) between 2 people onto being a family and redefining their roles (which is a lot tougher to manage).

Anonymous said...

Toothy, this might help!

Anti stress device

Jake said...

Thanks 6:55 but which head?

Jake said...

nm 6:55 I figured it out. Btw sorry about the mess I left on your device. I'll have an assistant clean it up.

Jake said...

Unless you want to lick it? Let me know asap and I'll tell the assistant to leave it alone, ok.

6:55 PM said...

I guess we need more detailed user instructions. LOL

Anonymous said...

How can so many random people know about the filming of this movie, with the right title and all?

LOL when they advertise all over town and at colleges for extras, it's not exactly difficult to know about it.

gays in Pittsburgh said...

Btw sorry about the mess I left on your device.

Jake,

forget devices and mess, just call us - we would love to help you out!

Jake said...

*cough*

Law Firm Shipping and Receiving Dept. said...

Another Fed Ex overnite express package of blank confidentiality agreement forms for Mr. Gyllenhaal.

Anonymous said...

After seeing dozens of interviews and videos with Jake, its clear he has a very needy personality. Austin on the other hand brought himself up in HW by his own bootstraps, seems self confident, willing to put himself out there, has a college degree. He may not be as successful as Jake financially or a-list vs not a-list, but he is a more self reliant person. We saw Jake fall apart once before when faced with the loss of Austin. I wouldn't be surprised to see him blow one day.

Anonymous said...

In the course of everything Ted wrote today, not once does he mention Baby Tile. You would think hiding a baby would be one of the major, if not the major, stress in Jake's life.

Did Ted forget about the kid? I seriously doubt it. People, there is no baby tile.

Maybe the "reinvented relationship" refers to the formerly exclusive partnership and love relationship having now devolved to one of fuck buddies.

I am far more concerned about the reference to using coke. Especially after Heath's tragic death, I would think Jake would stay as far away from that stuff as possible regardless of his emotinal strife.

But I also find it hard to believe that after truly care for Jake are blabbing to other people or Ted.

Anonymous said...

Meant to say that I find it hard to believe that people who truly care for Jake are blabbing to others, esp. Ted.

Anonymous said...

I don't think that is hard to believe. Maybe they think if they air what is going on it will help bring things to a head.

Anonymous said...

Oh you mean like an intervention played out on the pages of The Awful Truth? Yeah that'll work.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

^
"That we know of" is key.

Somebody tell Cantara it isn't the 4th yet.

Anonymous said...

"It Ain't: Kevin Spacey, Bradley Cooper, Robert Pattinson"

I've been thinking about the "it ain't" that Ted included in the Toothy blind item because they are often additional clues.

Kevin Spacey: Reference to Toothy being closeted like him (Ted mentions it in the blind item).

Bradley Cooper: He is bearding big with Renee Zwelleger and the fauxmance is covered in USWeekly just like Reeke.

Robert Pattinson: Robert? Robstin? Ted had two questions in the past that compared Pattinson with Buckley and mentioned the similarity between their names and joint names Robsten and Robstin.

Any other ideas?

Anonymous said...

11:08 PM, I think the drug reference was when he slept with that woman, when both were high and did weird sexual things.

I think Jake was an occasional user, but I doubt he does drugs anymore. Why would he say that he wouldn't even touch sleeping pills? I think he is more concerned about his life and health now. Heath seemed quite self-destructive and reckless. I don't say what happened to him wasn't an accident, but I think he had some serious issues/problems. Sorry if I offended fans, but it's my opinion.

Anonymous said...

After seeing dozens of interviews and videos with Jake, its clear he has a very needy personality.

There is nothing wrong with Jake's personality, he just have to relax and show it :)

Anonymous said...

Hollywood couple Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon were in town last night for a wedding - but, alas, not their own. The two actors flew in from Tinseltown to see Witherspoon’s assistant, Hillary Lyman, get hitched to Ken Franchi at the State Room high above Boston. Word is there may have been a few other familiar faces among the 180 or so guests. Well-wishers enjoyed an open bar and feasted on filet mignon and buttermilk chicken.

Boston

Anonymous said...

Happy birthday Ramona!

Anonymous said...

Flew in from Tinseltown? Who cares about facts, lol.

Anonymous said...

Ramona's one lucky girl. Great mom, great dad and I'm sure uncle Jake spoils her rotten.

Ramona with mom and Jake

Anonymous said...

:)

Anonymous said...

Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon were in town last night for a wedding

Someone is lying:

ericascopino: Paul Rudd and Reese Witherspoon-watching at Rittenhouse...
about 13 hours ago

Ramona said...

Ramona with mom and Jake

Guncle!

Anonymous said...

"someone is lying"

My money is on the wedding people.

Anonymous said...

Greater Pittsburgh Arts Council Are you going to be in the Jake Gyllenhaal movie with us? 14 peeps are signed up already! It's going to be very fun day. Do it!

^^ On GPAC's Twitter & Facebook. Only 14 people?! They need 400. Jake/Reeke is so boring/disgusting he can't even get extras to work in a movie.

Anonymous said...

jessemackj: Jake Gyllenhaal is trying to be incognito on my flight. I might be the only one that recognizes him since everyone else is a senior citizen
4 minutes ago

Anonymous said...

Nah, they don't give a shit about Reeke.
That's probably 14 facebook people, there is online form for signing up posted by 7:23 PM.

Anonymous said...

jessemackj (jesse johnson) and tony thaxton (who he tweets) are members of Motion City Soundtrack band. They both mention Barcelona for Saturday nite but who knows what that is (city, club name). jesse doesn't say where he's flying in/out of either.

Anonymous said...

The tweet about Paul and Reese didn't sound like they were filming, Rittenhouse= having dinner maybe although they would have mentioned it. There were no other tweets so i assume they weren't filming, though the tweet said "watching". The tweet was 14 hours ago, that would have been around 8:00, doesn't take long to fly to Boston from Phily if the wedding was in the evenong.

The tweet about Jake on the flight, the tweter is a Sox fan from reading his other tweets so I assume he is from Boston. If so can't tell if he is flying to or from Boston, the timeon tweets sometimes are at the moment or hours later. If it was this morning I would think he was leaving Boston, if it was yesterday, then he may have flown directly from Pittsburgh to Boston.

t said...

AndyPicarro: jake gyllenhaal is on my flight. So if we crash he will be the only thing the news talks about. And that kinda pisses me off.
3 minutes ago

Location: New York

Anonymous said...

The tweet was 14 hours ago, that would have been around 8:00, doesn't take long to fly to Boston from Phily if the wedding was in the evenong.

Who goes to dinner before wedding party???

Anonymous said...

Anne in L.A.

Anonymous said...

AndyPicarro: jake gyllenhaal is on my flight. So if we crash he will be the only thing the news talks about. And that kinda pisses me off.
3 minutes ago

Location: New York


He's flying to N.Y. for Ramona's birthday. :)

Anonymous said...

jessemackj (jesse johnson) and tony thaxton (who he tweets) are members of Motion City Soundtrack band.

Andy Picarro is a stand-up comedian.

Anonymous said...

10:20: Sounds like they may have finished up filming, no other tweets after that like we usally get, plenty of time to attend her friends wedding at night, not along flight. She probably stayed in Boston since it was her friend's wedding unless she has to film today like last Saturday according to the tweets Doesn't sound like Jake filmed at all yesterday. Most likely in NY for Ramona's birthday.

Anonymous said...

It's not Reese's friend, it's her assistant, Hillary Lyman. The tweet is about Rittenhouse restaurant and they aren't filming there.

Someone is lying - Boston Global gossiper, people who informed the gossiper or woman who posted that tweet.

Anonymous said...

MW vogue video

Anonymous said...

Awww... Michelle and Mario are great :)

Anonymous said...

"Awww... Michelle and Mario are great :)"

I like Michelle's hair and Mario is a really attractive guy. :D

Anonymous said...

I choose the woman that posted that tweet since they are not filming in that area and based on the tweets from yesterday, it doesn't sound like any filming was done in Philly at all. It wouldn't be the first time someone posted a fake tweet, she probably saw all the tweets about them filming and made it up IMO. The Jack Nicholson/Reese Witherspoon tweets about filming down my block are all BS baseed on sets being set up and not actual filming since Jackis done with filing and has left Philly.

No other Reese in Philly tweets that I remember from yesterday, so she most likely have flown to Boston. Either she stayed in Boston or flew back to Philly and he flew to NY.

Anonymous said...

I choose the woman that posted that tweet

Of course you do - everything for Reeke! lol

t said...

AndyPicarro: jake gyllenhaal is on my flight.

AndyPicarro: Lets go Pitt... being a fan of a Big East a team is like being a fan of a special olympian
9:42 AM Sep 12th

Anonymous said...

I don't know where Reese was yesterday but she wasn't filming based on tweets. Jake wasn't either based on tweets. The only direct sighting/tweets of them was a sighting of him in downtown Pittsburgh in the afternoon and of that tweet of her and Rudd in Philly.

Anonymous said...

No tweets = no info.

Yesterday was Friday, a working day. It does not mean there was no filming because there was no tweets. Geez.

Anonymous said...

jessemackj:

GO PATS!!!!!!!
4:12 PM Sep 14th from Echofon

Sat down for dinner 5 minutes ago and the Sox were losing 3-0. Now up 5-3!!! Go Sox!!!
6:24 PM Sep 16th from Echofon

Pats and Sox game:

http://twitter.com/jessemackj

Anonymous said...

jessemackj:



Flight delayed over an hour because the toilet doesn't flush. It's only an hour long flight. Can't people just hold it?
about 4 hours ago from Echofon

Jake Gyllenhaal is trying to be incognito on my flight. I might be the only one that recognizes him since everyone else is a senior citizen
about 5 hours ago from Echofon

Anonymous said...

Jake is Boston Red Sox fan, too.

Arnold said...

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger rejected the suggestion that he could pardon Roman Polanski if he's returned to the United States, saying, "It doesn't matter if you are a big-time movie actor or a big-time movie director or producer... I think that he is a very respected person, and I am a big admirer of his work. But nevertheless, I think he should be treated like everyone else." [People]

Anonymous said...

That report about them at the wedding is probably true. PA to Bos is a quick flight. They probably both went, stayed overnight and Jake is flying to NYC today before going back to PIT. But what would be telling to me is wether the Chin will meet him in NYC or not.

Anonymous said...

Very interesting analysis of the "nots" 6:16.

I had another thought, Pattinson rumored to involved on the down-low with his co-star.

Anonymous said...

But what would be telling to me is wether the Chin will meet him in NYC or not.

Yes, the chin in NYC would prove that Boston is PR fiction.

Heroes said...

Hayden Panettiere pushed producers to include a lesbian storyline for her Heroes character, Claire: "I kinda threw it out there... They (writers) put you in relationships and I was like, 'Can I just be with a girl or something...? Let's do that." [DailyExpress]

Jake said...

Anne in L.A.

Anne, quit fooling around! Pack your bags, I have a lot of new gay jokes to tell!

Ted said...

Dear Ted:

Did Austin Nichols kiss a girl (Sophia Bush) and actually like it?
—Teddy bear

Dear Funny One:
Not as much as Katy Perry, probably.

Anonymous said...

baseballguydc: EXCLUSIVE: Your heard it here first, Reese Witherspoon and Jake will be at the Next WHITE HOUSE EASTER EGG HUNT.. she will read to the kids
about 2 hours ago from web

No wonder Jake is doing all this Sesame street/electric co stuff.

Anonymous said...

Sophia Bush is very kissable :)

Anonymous said...

1:38 PM

Six months is way too early for Easter party plans.

Anonymous said...

Easter egg hunts are not a party. The guy who posted that is a DC gossiper, he must have heard something.

Anonymous said...

DC gossiper - no name, no website, no credibility.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if all the Reeke Sesame Street and WH Easter Egg Hunt is set up so Reeke will (get married/civil union?) and/or adopt a 2 or 3 year old kid (BT). Or Jake will adopt on his own (his own kid!). Truly, I wonder.

Anonymous said...

Odd thing to make up don't you think?

Anonymous said...

No, it's odd just because we don't follow other odd celebrity bullshit posted on the Net.

Anonymous said...

What Sesame Street and Shalom Sesame have to do with reeking?! Did you see list of celebrities doing Sesame Street?

Anonymous said...

DC gossiper tweet said the beard will read to the kids. Jake's last name wasn't even there lol. Maybe he was put in the tweet because people assume he's joined at the hip with the beard.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, but Jake's involvement is all of sudden despite of Naomi's connections to both shows, neither Jake nor Maggie has been involved in those shows previously.

Maggie=Ramona

Jake=Reese' kids/WH Easter egg hunt?

There is no BT

Anonymous said...

Funny how the only other time the beard has been spotted at a church was about 3 years ago at another Easter Egg hunt in LA. (Jake was walking with his family to lunch, remember?)

Btw why would Jake be at an Easter thing? He's Jewish. When did Jews start celebrating Easter? LOL

Anonymous said...

2:28 we will have to agree to disagree about BT.

Anonymous said...

The beard wants as much PR as she can get. This also sets up a "We're of 2 different religious beliefs" perfect breakup.

Anonymous said...

http://baseballguydc.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

^^^

11 posts in 2008 and 12 in 2009. His "gossip" is joke.

Anonymous said...

2:32: No, they already di that back in 2007when you had Reese at an easter egg hunt with the kids and you had Jake the same day out with his family carrying a chocalate Easter bunny!!

I have a feeling that Jake isn't a relgious Jew since he mentions being a practicng Buddhist.

he sure rhe hell wouldn't be seen carryin a chocolate bunny on easter.

I remember that Theresa who used to run Heathcentral said she saw Jake and his father at Mass at a Catholic church, this was back in 2006, she posted it on DC.

I think he and his family are more spiritual then actually following one religion.

Anonymous said...

2:37 All gossip is a joke. At least he does have a profile and isn't just some anon. person tweeting.

Anonymous said...

I have a feeling that Jake isn't a relgious Jew since he mentions being a practicng Buddhist.

Jake is a Jew who's doing Shalom Sesame.

Anonymous said...

2:37 All gossip is a joke. At least he does have a profile and isn't just some anon. person tweeting.

No, all gossip isn't a joke and yes, he is some anon. person tweeting because there is no name.

Anonymous said...

I don't think too many Hollywood people take religion too seriously. Spielberg who is Jewish is Drew Barrymore's (both parents Christian) godfather. Jake is M.'s godfather and Michelle is Christian.

PR said...

2007 Easter Hunt was before the lovebirds got involved. Three years later in 2010 they realize their religious differences are too strong and they break up. But it's a friendly break up and they will always love each other. In fact Jake is so heartbroken that he never marries or is seen with another woman again. And in twenty or thirty years he'll confess that no woman could ever match up to his lovely Reese and so he turned gay.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, but Jake's involvement is all of sudden...

LOL

Please explain this celebrities sudden involment:

As always, Sesame Street remains the “must do” for celebrities and icons. Parents and caregivers are sure to laugh alongside their children, as the new season features: NBA MVP Kobe Bryant; actors Greg Kinnear, Jake Gyllenhaal, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Cameron Diaz, Hugh Jackman, Debra Messing, Eva Longoria, Adrian Grenier, Julianna Marguiles, Judah Freidlander, Sarah Jessica Parker, Adam Sandler, Jimmy Fallon, Jenny Garth, Paul Rudd, Ricky Gervais, Patricia Arquette, Brendan Fraser, Matthew Fox, Christina Applegate, Debi Mazar and Cedric the Entertainer; The View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck; Grammy Award winner Ziggy Marley; Grammy Award nominee Jason Mraz; NASCAR superstar Jeff Gordon; NFL Star and Today Show correspondent Tiki Barber; Today Show co-host Meredith Vieira; Tony Award winner Lin-Manuel Miranda; and Access Hollywood host Nancy O’Dell.

Anonymous said...

I doubt Reeke was at a wedding for an assistant. First of all, we would of heard more about it than from a gossip columnist, Two, celebs rarely go to weddings because it takes attention away from the real focus of the celebration. Three, she was an assistant not a friend. Four, Reeke would of PR'd it to death. Five... shall I go on?!

Anonymous said...

That's enough, thanks :)

Anonymous said...

Re. Barrymore/Spielberg: He seems to support her a lot. I've seen many pics of them together and most recently he was at the premiere of her new flick "Whip It". Holding her hand. They seem very fond of each other.

Anonymous said...

One question, why does it matter if they were at the wedding or not? Who cares? I don't get the importance!

Anonymous said...

Steven Spielberg was one of the HW people who refused to sign the Polanski petition. I love him even more now.

Anonymous said...

3:01 #1 you obviously don't *get* the scroll button either. Use it.

Anonymous said...

Steven Spielberg was one of the HW people who refused to sign the Polanski petition. I love him even more now.

IA.

Anonymous said...

Jake isn't a religous Jew because he wasn't raised one. His mother is Jewish but her family is secular, even secular Jews have Bar Mitzvahs, outside of that I never heard him speak about it but he does mention being a Buddhist.

Lots of non-Jews are participating in Shalom Sesame street including Christina Applegate and Cedric the Entertainer.

The wedding was low-key, I doubt that they thought by inviting them would take anything away from it.

Who cares if they went anyway, why should it surprise anyone, all they do is follow each other around it seems.

Waiting for tweets of them in NY this weekend..

Anonymous said...

Who cares if they went anyway

Reeking isn't interesting in this case - fake tweets / gossip fiction / ... is.

Anonymous said...

All tweets are fake!

Anonymous said...

^^ Babbler, fuck off.

Anonymous said...

"Reeking isn't interesting in this case - fake tweets / gossip fiction / ... is."

There's no way to know if the wedding story is true. Unless we get to see some pics...

Anonymous said...

The wedding story sounds like lame bullshit.

Will You Be Able To Watch Anything Created By Polanski Apologists? said...

...
So this week, when several celebrities signed off on the "Free Roman Polanski" petition, it wasn't at all surprising to see the level of disappointment in the comments. People mentioned feeling "hurt" and "betrayed" by several celebrities, including Wes Anderson and Whoopi Goldberg, for their support of Polanski following his arrest, and the same phenomenon seems to be happening, albeit on a much smaller scale, following the revelations that David Letterman was having affairs with several of his staff members.

It should be noted that the defense of a man who raped a child and the revelation that a grown man had consensual relationships with his staffers are two very separate things, but the disappointment that we feel when a celebrity takes a position or engages in activities that surprise us is somewhat similar, in that it's hard to ever view the celebrity the same way again once we know something we'd rather not know about them. In talking with Anna about this yesterday, she mentioned that it was a bit like a celebrity death, and I agree, in that there's that weird numb feeling you go through before you realize that the person who created the things you loved is gone, and all you are left with is their work. Sometimes, it's hard to watch a film, or listen to a song, or read a novel without the ghost of that person looming over the experience for a while, and so we need to step away for a bit.

As far as the Polanski apologists go, we're stuck in a position that places us in the denial mode of his defenders, who are clearly valuing the man's artistic contributions over the fact that he raped a 13-year-old girl. When this story fades away a bit, will we all be able to go back to watching Wes Anderson films, or Martin Scorsese films, or anything Natalie Portman stars in without thinking, "This person is a rape apologist?" Or will we end up shutting out the realities of things in favor of the work itself? It's hard to say at this point, though in many ways, I suppose, the experience of seeing any of the work created by those who signed the petition will be tainted.
...
Jezebel

Ted said...

Dear Ted:
I just heard that James Franco was going to appear on General Hospital! WTF? Guess he wants to seriously tank his career. Soaps are something you do in the beginning of your career when you're starving, naive and stupid. Then you can say "Oh, I was starving, naive and stupid." But after you've had some success, there is no excuse, dude! Talk about poor career choices...then all you can say is, "Yeah, my career is seriously f--ked, so I figure even something this damn sad won't hurt it more!" Well...yeah, it can and will.
—H

Dear Don't Get It:
Franco made it clear a long time ago he marches to a professional beat: It's why we love him; you should, too. He certainly had the guts to take on playing Sean Penn's lover in Milk, not to mention going back to school instead of whoring himself out to every event he could in Hollywood. Franco does what he wants and he wants to have fun. Let him.

Ted said...

Dear Ted:
I know you have said all your posts should be reviewed and dissected carefully as you use "hidden" meanings in your wording and "clues" are given in the way you use certain catchphrases, highlighted words and abbreviations. Does this also apply to the photos you use? And are you really that crafty?
—Ann

Dear Sneak Attack:
Of course I'm that crafty, babe! You have to be to survive in this biz. There were no clues to Toothy Tile or any other Vice victims in this answer, BTW.

Anonymous said...

Btw why would Jake be at an Easter thing? He's Jewish. When did Jews start celebrating Easter? LOL


I am Jewish (not religous).

#1 chocolate bunnies

#2 peeps

#3 hunting for easter eggs is fun.

Anonymous said...

That baseballguydc guy has zero credibility, but there would be just one reason for doing Easter thing - PoP marketing campaign.

Anonymous said...

It Ain't: Kevin Spacey, Bradley Cooper, Robert Pattinson

I've been thinking about the "it ain't" that Ted included in the Toothy blind item because they are often additional clues.

Kevin Spacey: Reference to Toothy being closeted like him (Ted mentions it in the blind item).
Bradley Cooper: He is bearding big with Renee Zwelleger and the fauxmance is covered in USWeekly just like Reeke.
Robert Pattinson: Robert? Robstin? Ted had two questions in the past that compared Pattinson with Buckley and mentioned the similarity between their names and joint names Robsten and Robstin.


Bradley and Renée fauxmance scenario is very similar to Reeke script, but Renée is less ambitious and desperate compared to Reese.

Anonymous said...

I'm not a Franco fan.

Anonymous said...

^^I think Franco wants to come off as edgy and so much above everyone in Hollywood.
Everyone should like him, Ted? Well, I won't.
JF is currently dating a 19 y/o from NYU. He himself is almost 33.

Anonymous said...

Franco is DOING edgy things - as actor, director and writer.

Anonymous said...

I am Jewish (not religous).

#1 chocolate bunnies

#2 peeps

#3 hunting for easter eggs is fun.


Eating candy and looking for Easter eggs in your backyard is different than attending and participating in an official White House religious-themed event.

Anonymous said...

My acquaintances are Muslims who live in a Christian country and they celebrate Christmas... with tree, presents etc. to make their kids happy.

Anonymous said...

My family didn't want to waste food/eggs and thought us kids got enough candy as it was and didn't want to rot our teeth so they got plastic eggs and put money in them and hid them. The eggs had anything from one dollar up to twenty, with one first prize egg having a fifty dollar bill and one grand prize egg having a hundred dollar bill in it. I miss those days!

Anonymous said...

Everyone should like him, Ted? Well, I won't.

Only Franco can make you like him :)
Franco seems serious about his profession and that deserves respect.

Anonymous said...

IMO it's great that Franco is going on a soap. It's different, he's different. Different is a good thing.

Franco said...

I'm so special!!!!

Anonymous said...

I myself am a Ryan Gosling fan. He's not trying too hard, he just IS talented and cool.
That's what I respect.

Anonymous said...

JF is currently dating a 19 y/o from NYU. He himself is almost 33.

He's not raping 13 year olds or any other underaged people, he's not throwing hissy fits, and he's not bearding.

Anonymous said...

Jake is talented too and all in all a nice fellow. What I don't like is his attachment to Reese and his recent career choices. He can do better. I feel all this Reeke business is dragging him down and I'm very surprised he doesn't seem to notice it and put an end to it.

Anonymous said...

He's not raping 13 year olds or any other underaged people, he's not throwing hissy fits, and he's not bearding.

Weren't there rumors that he brutally raped a guy or was that someone else?

Jake said...

Franco said... I'm so special!!!

Me too! Let's be special together!

Anonymous said...

Someone else. Was it Boy George? Someone who has since been charged with it but I can't remember who.

Anonymous said...

Weren't there rumors that he brutally raped a guy or was that someone else?

That was a blind item.

Anonymous said...

Franco said... I'm so special!!!

Me too! Let's be special together!



Franco and Jake together: 2 guys on a bed, both lying on their backs with their legs up in the air waiting for the other one to stick it in.

Anonymous said...

^^LOL.

Anonymous said...

Come on 6:18 PM #2, modern gays are versatile - Jake and Franco would play Rock, Paper, Scissors for it!

Anonymous said...

So Ted said that Austin didn't like kissing the Bush. Is this the first allusion by Ted about Austin being gay?

Anonymous said...

Aug 26, 2009

Dear Awful Truth:
I've been reading all this talk about Sophia Bush dating Austin Nichols and some people wishing that she starts dating Robert Buckley. Am I the only one who wants Robert and Austin together? Wouldn't they be the hottest couple ever? Is there any probability that my dream comes true?
—Miranda

Dear Brokeback Hill:
I would way rather have them together than Sophia and Austin. Gross.

Anonymous said...

The WH Easter egg hunt which takes place a week after Easter is not a religious event you dope.

Anonymous said...

Easter is not a religious event! LMAO

Anonymous said...

^^It is. It is the resurrection of Jesus Christ.

Anonymous said...

Of course it is, I was joking with 6:32 PM.

Anonymous said...

^^Oh.

Anonymous said...

The WH Easter egg hunt which takes place a week after Easter

A week after Easter???

The White House Easter Egg Roll is an annual family event to hunt for and race Easter Eggs on the White House Lawn while enjoying storytelling and a visit with the Easter Bunny. The holiday tradition has a long history dating back to 1878 when President Rutherford B. Hayes officially opened the White House grounds to local children for egg rolling on Easter Monday.

Anonymous said...

new Peter Sarsgaard interview

Anonymous said...

So Ted said that Austin didn't like kissing the Bush. Is this the first allusion by Ted about Austin being gay?

6:30 PM + there was more from Ted during Summer, but I didn't save it.

Anonymous said...

The WH Easter egg hunt which takes place a week after Easter is not a religious event you dope.

Who's calling who a dope?! 6:32 who says Easter isn't a religious event is the major doophus.

Anonymous said...

I was hoping for Jake to finish his college education and during college do some interesting indie movies and gain even more credibility as actor. Instead he chose a silly blockbuster movie and Reese Witherspoon. I can't describe how disappointed in him I am. I know it's irrational since he's someone I don't know personally, but I can't help feeling this way.

Jake said...

Sorry!

(((7:05 PM)))

Anonymous said...

IMO Jake will NEVER be the person we thought he was. His greed is too big and Hollywood is the only thing he has. The old lovable Jake is long gone.

Anonymous said...

IMO Jake will NEVER be the person we thought he was. His greed is too big and Hollywood is the only thing he has. The old lovable Jake is long gone.

:(

Anonymous said...

The old lovable Jake is long gone.

Just temporary hidden :)

HEYYYYY YOOOOU GUUUUUYS!

Anonymous said...

The Easter EGG ROLL is not a religious event, that's why it's held the dat after Easter Sunday.

Jake has attended Mass with his father, that and his Buddhist ties and him saying that he feels more Jewish suggest that he is more spiritual than belonging to one religion.

Anonymous said...

I was hoping for Jake to finish his college education and during college do some interesting indie movies

Well, Nailed is an interesting indie movie!

Anonymous said...

"The Easter EGG ROLL is not a religious event"

The word "EASTER" kind of ruins your theory, 7:23. LOL

Anonymous said...

The Easter EGG ROLL is not a religious event, that's why it's held the dat after Easter Sunday.

Ouch, you are truly clueless.

Anonymous said...

"Well, Nailed is an interesting indie movie!"

Yes and LAOD (though not indie) doesn't sound bad either. But I'm not interested in Brothers and PoP at all.

Anonymous said...

Just temporary hidden

Nah. I doubt we will ever get some of the fun, spontaneous quotes like Jake of yore used to say. Now he has to be careful. Bearding and living a fake life will do that.

Anonymous said...

But I'm not interested in Brothers

What?! You are not interested in bad boy and jailbird Jake??

Anonymous said...

IMO Reeke will be announcing their "engagement" any day now. Or should I say "any issue now." It's the only thing that will get them headlines, and they need them desperately. Going for coffee together and yogurt with the kids ain't cutting it anymore.

Anonymous said...

Not 7:26 but I'm not interested in Brothers anymore because of the child rape apologist Natalie Portman. And Jake is friends with her?

Anonymous said...

"Engagement" would give them a few days of media interest, but wouldn't make them interesting.

Anonymous said...

And Jake is friends with her?

I hope so. Nat is an old friend and that is very valuable in Hollywood.

Anonymous said...

"Hope so?!" Jake is good friends with someone who thinks child rape by an artist is ok, and that's it's blasphemy that the artist is arrested while on his way to a film festival. Makes me wonder what Jake's opinion about child rape is. If someone I knew had that opinion I would drop them instantly.

Anonymous said...

^^Jake has many friends. I doubt Natalie is that crucial.

Anonymous said...

Natalie seems pretty dumb (don't give that she's a college graduate, I read her interviews), she probably didn't know what she was signing. ;)

Anonymous said...

Natalie did not say nor imply that child rape by an artist or anyone else is ok - you saw petition text so you know that too.

Anonymous said...

" If someone I knew had that opinion I would drop them instantly."

Me too.

Anonymous said...

"Engagement" would give them a few days of media interest, but wouldn't make them interesting.

I disagree. The engagement would create all types of tabloid media coverage, from the ring selection to the beard picking out her gown, etc. It would generate a whole new interest in them and Reese/Reeke fan fervor (Jake, not so much). An engagement would bring a shitload of PR to Reese and reinforce that Jake is straight.

Anonymous said...

Reeke is too boring for tabloids.

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