Just another beard

Dear Ted:
Norm of the Las Vegas Journal clearly knows George Clooney better than you do. He reported breathlessly on Clooney's "romantic" Valentine's Day dinner with Sarah Larson and her boss in Vegas, and he described the actor's singing and dancing with Larson around a very public fountain later. You should resign in shame for suggesting this relationship is less than it appears to be. I'm embarrassed for you. You obviously wouldn't know true love if it jumped up and down on a couch for you.
PoliticoGalNot
Los Angeles

Dear Looney for Clooney:
Not even Margo's allowed on my couch without wiping her paws off first. And since you live somewhere that clearly isn't reality, you've got a lot to learn about how celebs act when they know reporters aren't writing articles about them.

Source: The Awful Express

Dick Cheney ?!

Dear Ted:
I know who Toothy Tile is! Dick Cheney! We haven’t seen him for, what, six months? He really is in the closet.
Larry
Minneapolis

Dear Deranged:
You must drink as much as Dubya. Toothy Tile, for the record, is more than doable.

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth

Neil & David

Neil Patrick Harris and his long-term boyfriend David Burtka, at a party at Julius' in NYC.

Source: Perez Hilton

Fauxmance

Dear Ted:
Is the woman Toothy Tile's currently using as a beard also using him as a beard? In Old Hollywood, there were "lavender" marriages and relationships between two gay people of the opposite gender to throw off the public's suspicions. Do these still exist?
Nan
Des Moines, Iowa

Dear Crack Addict:
Get high much?

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth

Gay in Hollywood

"Strangely enough, some gay actors say that while America's comfort level has improved considerably, the entertainment industry hasn't caught up. It may be 2007, they say, but the vibe inside studio casting offices can feel surprisingly like 1957.

These actors say being outed remains a huge threat to a performer's career, particularly for men. An announcement, even a rumor, can eliminate them from the running for straight roles – the roles that make up the vast majority of available work.
...
"From an actor's point of view, I understand why they are scared to death of saying anything for fear of being pigeonholed," casting director Matt Messinger says. "Gay people are cast as straight all the time. But if you're asking if things have improved for openly gay actors, I can't say it's any easier now."

Source: article Two sides to gay in Hollywood

The show must go on

Dear Ted:
I think it is absolutely disgusting that Jake G. is out with Reese at a time like this. Does he have no shame left? It is like he is using Heath's death to promote this fauxmance.
S.
New York City

Dear Tough Take:
Boy basically kept himself in hiding (on-set of his in-production flick) for a week following the news of his departed friend. How long do ya wanna box in Jakey-Poo’s mourning mug? The show—and life—must go on eventually.

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth

The Cruel and Unusual Replies Have It

Dear Ted:
I just added egomaniacal Eddie Murphy to the list of people whose movies and shows I will not watch. He joins Rosie O'Donnell, Russell Crowe, Oprah and Tom Cruise. But here's why I am writing—Eddie Murphy is Toothy Tile, right? God knows he's Toothy.
Jeane
Walnut Creek, California

Dear Blacklisting Betty:
Eddie, Rosie, Russell and Tom aren’t too surprising celebs to leave a bad taste in people’s mouths. But what in heaven’s name do you have against Mama O? I’d think at least the cast of The Hills would wind up on a blacklist before Oprah. In any case, Eddie deserves a smart punch in his smilies, but he ain’t no Toothy.

* * *

Dear Ted:
I want to let you know I am currently on my deathbed and will be long gone before Toothy Tile is ever revealed. Can you just tell me? I will not reveal it to anyone!
Amy
Richmond, Virginia

Dearly Beloved:
My lips will be sealed at your wake. I'll bring a casserole, though!

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth and The Awful Express