Dear Ted:
Is Toothy Tile Vince Vaughn, and is Pickled Fickle from One Rent-a-Wreck Blind Vice Heather Locklear?
Gretas
Seattle
Dear Sexuality Crasher:
The real T2’s simply horrified you suggested Vaughn, horrified! See, Toothy’s rather svelte, and Pickled Fickle’s a man, dear. Give H.L. a little more credit.
Dear Ted:
Is it still true that the person featured in your Blind Vice is still named in your column the day the B.V. appears? Or since your column went daily, does the individual only appear sometime during the week when the B.V. is about to run?
Janie
Chicago
Dear Sneaking Around:
Darling, this is a gossip column, not Scientific American. We give clues all over the place, but it’s sort like sex — when we feel like it. And yes, often that's by mentioning the culprit elsewhere.
Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth
***
P.S.
A true Toothy fan sent me a file containing all Toothy Tile blind items and Dear Ted letters. I’ll try to keep it updated:
Toothy Tile Archive
***
July 31, 2008
Quakes, Queers 'n' Sneers!
Teddy C.'s house shakes as much as Christian Bale's rep these days! Plus, Tori dishes domesticity, not to mention 90210, and Toothy Tile has some majorly smokin' competition coming up, can't wait!
Dangerous Doings
Elsewhere, not only am I being chastised for saying I don’t buy Lance Armstrong’s new aw-shucks-I’m-just-an-American benevolence reinvention (this man’s a player like nobody’s biz, just ask freshly ejected Kate Hudson if you don't believe), Toothy Tile’s handlers ain’t too happy with me either, not to mention camp Tom Cruise, girlfriends. Sure, there are more than a few behind-the-scenes T-town wizards who would be more than happy to see my glass house shatter and crumble deep into a ravine...me, head first, along with it.
Read Herring?
Oh, before we get to such scintillating bits ‘n’ boobiness—means Tori Spelling’s on the way, trust—must tell you all that I dare say Toothy Tile must be paying a very well known, blockbuster-starring actor to homo-outdo his gay ways. Hate to be a tease ‘n’ all (that’s a damn lie), but you’ll just have to wait until Friday’s Blind Vice to find out the deets, hon-childs. I mean, maybe that nasty fag bitch Christopher Ciccone really has let loose something in the celeb air right now, what with his sibling-stabbing memoirs and the hilarious Cristina Crawford-esque interviews he’s pulling ‘round town. ‘Cause Toothy’s new matinee rival is pulling really over-the-top, stereotypical Rock Hudson retro sex shenanigans. Delish, can’t wait to tell you all!
Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth
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502 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 401 – 502 of 502What exactly is everyone smoking today? Why do we keep rehashing this marriage / baby nonsense? This rumor was nonsense ten months ago, five months ago, three weeks ago and yesterday. What makes you think it's going to be valid tomorrow? We're being spun because it's a slow news cycle. People and US Weekly are trying to distract us from yet another semi-embarassment for Jake : PoP is delayed for a year.
That's it. Nothing else is going on in Reekeville. Nothing.
I'm smoking hashish with Danny DeVito ...
People: Wednesday July 30, 2008
Caught in the Act!
"Jake Gyllenhaal, reconnecting with Reese Witherspoon after spending time in Europe. The actor patiently waited for his girlfriend at the Beverly Hills Hotel's Fountain Coffee Room as she had a business meal upstairs at the Polo Lounge. "He was such a good guy, just sitting there, hanging out [and] waiting for her," an onlooker tells us. "They looked so happy when they met up."
Did this fake sighting have a point?
10.15. Thank you, exactly!
What?! Reese met up with Jake at the Polo Lounge and there are no pap pics? ..... wow, blow me down with a feather!
via johnmayer.yuku.com:
"I'm going to give you the scoop and I'm going to let people quote your interview. Celebrities read everything. They are their own biggest stalkers; they know every single gossip site, and every single post as it goes up. They act like they don't-but they all do. Celebrities, by that estimation . . . do terrible research because all they ever do is read that without anything else to give them perspective. They're such bad researchers and their science is such shit that they sit in front of a computer for one hour every morning and read one control group."
Jake, if you're reading this control group, here's a message for ya: I'm waiting, baby.
XoX U NO WHO
From Towleroad...
James Franco gives a charming interview to Lynn Hirschberg of the NYT in which he discusses Pineapple Express which he says he basically sees as a love story between a drug dealer and his client. They also talk about Milk (in which he plays Harvey Milk's lover Scott Smith), and Franco offers up the answer to what will likely be the most frequent question he gets on press junkets:
"Doing Milk was an incredible experience and I talked about how My Own Private Idaho had such an effect on me and also Drugstore Cowboy. Gus van Sant had been a hero of mine since I was a teenager and Sean Penn as well. And so it was a chance to work with two of my heroes. I will be asked what it was like to kiss Sean Penn about a million times and the few times I run into paparazzi that's their new annoying thing. It was uncomfortable. Especially like the first time we did it. We didn't do it many times but the first kiss of the film he had on — he grew a beard but he needed a slightly thicker beard so he had some hairs intertwined in his real hairs and so we kissed and those kept getting in my mouth, and it was just kind of uncomfortable, and not that fun...(jokes) When I saw Spicoli, I just wanted to make out with him!"
Many people are guessing James Franco for Ted's Crotch Uh-Lastic BI, by the way.
Either way they are famewhores, promoting their relationship to advance their career and for their image. I wish Jake wouldn't partake in this, but if he thinks it's useful for him...
Yep, two tacky famewhores.
"More than 60 million women a week now read the enormously influential glossies" and Reese Avon Lady Witherspoon needs to sell shitty cosmetics and cheap parfumes.
Celebrities read everything. They are their own biggest stalkers; they know every single gossip site, and every single post as it goes up. They act like they don't-but they all do.
Hi Jake!
Jake, sweetie, have you seen my man purse? Can't find it anywhere ...
James Franco: When I saw Spicoli, I just wanted to make out with him!
Sean Penn as Jeff Spicoli (1982)
Interesting choice of photographs:
Austin bio (Austin and Jake)
Jake bio (Lance, Mayer, Jake)
5:36, sorry to bother you, but is the heath/jake/dga picture available anywhere else besides IHJ?
Jake and Heath - DGA
Ed Westwick Is Totally Straight
You know that dude in the back is totally saying, "Gurrrrl. Look at that flamer over there. My tranny poodle wouldn't even rock those pants. I can smell his ass jam from here. Anyway, fuck this dyke. Let's go see Mamma Mia again." Those dudes are totally mistaken! Ed Westwick is not a homo! Yes, there's been rumors that he's totally boning Chace Crawford, but it's a falsity! He was spotted the other night making out with a chick! That proves everything!
Some witness-type saw Ed at Lit in NYC on Wednesday night with his tongue down some random chick's throat. The witness said, "When the two left together, Ed was leading her by the hand. He was moving quick, but he had time to wink at a hot brunette before slipping out."
There! We can finally shut the closet door on those homo rumors.
Here's Ed wearing totally straight dude pants on the set of "Gossip Girl" the other day. I'm not being sarcastic either. Only pimps and mafia bosses wear pants like that.
Dlisted
Tuesday, July 29th, NY Daily News
"Gossip Girl" co-stars, roommates and friends Chace Crawford and Ed Westwick are still thisclose.
...
Some witness-type saw Ed at Lit in NYC on Wednesday night with his tongue down some random chick's throat.
That was quick!
Interesting choice of photographs
I don't remember seeing this picure before.
Jake, your hand is too low!
Lance, quit staring at Jake!
Lance, Mayer and Jake
Posted on OMG
fyi said...
Sitemeter is blocking all Internet Explorer browser access since late Friday night.
Thids is happening to ALL blogs [check out Google Blogger to see] not just yours. Please contact Sitemeter and COMPLAIN.
^^^ Thank God for the Firefox browser!
So Jake has another career setback and surprise surprise we get another phoneyspoon article straight away! It's so fucking predictable. I'm sure Clifton Collins jr is happy to get his name in the press, though, since it might lead to more work. (I remember him in Capote, he was good in it) How sweet of Phoneyspoon to help out others with PR.
This old quote from Jake sounds so fake now with the bearding, showmance and his famewhoring ways!
“Some movies you fall a step behind and some you stay in the same place, make the same choices. And then sometimes there are people who know more than you but show you, and that's the maximum you can hope for - doing that with someone who says, "I like you for what you are, and I want you to be in my picture." I didn't have to fake it or put on a mask - all the resources I had inside me were more than adequate. I don't want to pretend to be something ... I'm not pretending any more to fit somebody's mold. That's a long-winded statement but - why not do what you really think, even if it's a mistake?”
http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/26385843.html
oh yeah and it always makes me laugh when people try to claim Reeke as real by saying that Reese would never be in a fake relationship. Uh, this is the woman who stayed in an unhappy marriage for years so she wouldn't get bad PR. She and Ryan would probably still be married if he hadn't met Abbie. So I think bearding is no problem for Reese at all. Although 2010 is a looong time away. Are Phoneyspoon really up for the long haul?
I'm sure Clifton Collins jr is happy to get his name in the press...
Who wouldn't? A favour for a favour.
Are Phoneyspoon really up for the long haul?
As we can see it's very easy to sell a fauxmance and it doesn't require a lot of time or effort.
The real question is are WE up for the long haul?
oh yeah and it always makes me laugh when people try to claim Reeke as real by saying that Reese would never be in a fake relationship.
Even more laughable is fangirls claim that Reese does not need PR.
Under which rock do fangirls live?
This old quote from Jake sounds so fake now with the bearding, showmance and his famewhoring ways!
#9 Jake Gyllenhaal.
With a talent and instinct beyond his years, Jake Gyllenhaal proves an actor can be both a media celebrity and a critically acclaimed actor. Known for his antics on TV talk shows, Gyllenhaal has charmed his way into the hearts of American audiences. But the guy has international appeal and a following that could rival today’s biggest stars.
Famous Roles: His role as the disturbed teen Donnie Darko and as gulf war veteran Anthony Swofford in Sam Mendes’ Jarhead. But most famous for his role in Brokeback Mountain as the passionate and idealistic Jack Twist opposite Heath Ledger.
Why he’s on the top10: Movie lovers easily recognize Jake for his intensity and dedication to his roles. Not easily blinded by the glitz and glamour of being a celebrity, he remains true to his craft and continues to play challenging and interesting roles. Says Jake:
"Some movies you fall a step behind and some you stay in the same place, make the same choices. And then sometimes there are people who know more than you but show you, and that's the maximum you can hope for - doing that with someone who says, "I like you for what you are, and I want you to be in my picture." I didn't have to fake it or put on a mask - all the resources I had inside me were more than adequate. I don't want to pretend to be something ... I'm not pretending any more to fit somebody's mold. That's a long-winded statement but - why not do what you really think, even if it's a mistake?"
Coming up: Starring with Natalie Portman and Tobey Maguire in the highly-anticipated feature called Brothers.
Source: 50 HOTTEST YOUNG ACTORS: THE TOP 10
http://themovie-fanatic.com/top_50_young_actors/version_1/tmf_top10/
That's a long-winded statement but - why not do what you really think, even if it's a mistake?
Now when Jake got his big summer movie chance it will be interesting to see if "challenging and interesting" is really important to him.
Is the Chin up for the long haul? You bet.
Those Avon ads (the hair hiding that chin, LOLZ) won't work if she is a dumped divorcee.
Her career won't work if she is a dumped divorcee.
She needs to sell that assy slap 'n grease to the soccer moms, and she needs to sell her rom-com flics to the masses. She can't be an object of pity, a victim. She has to be an object of envy.
So she needs to project that she is in-charge, on top, and desirable to men. Who ya gonna call? (Matthew Broderick already taken.)
Yep, long haul. In Hollywood, that means 2 more yrs at least.
2 more years of Reeke shit? Bloody Hell.
I do think Lance and Matt and a fling. I also think Jake got Matt to introduce him to Lance. Jake wanted a part and may have had a crush on Lance. When Jake entered the summer threesome the gay rumors started. Lance had to put an end to it because of Livestrong. I think he did like Jake though.
Kate Hudson is the biggest F*g Hag in LA. Me thinks Lance might like the peen a lot and needs to hook up with whoever is available on occassion for business purposes. Kate is always available.
Kate was in The Four Feathers with Heath. Small Hollywood!
Kate is tight with Reese. Kate has taught Reese everything she knows about being a good F*g Hag. In all honesty kate is a very gay friendly person. She has many gay male friends.
I don't think Kate and Lance was fake. Even if Lance likes peen, I think he likes vayjayjay too. They both seem to get around a lot tbqh.
Matilda does not look happy
Michelle strikes me as a "easy to get" type of woman from what I've read about her before and after she was with Heath. Doesn't mean she's a bad person or mother.
Kate Hudson was smothering Lance Armstrong
Okay, Kate Hudson wasn’t physically smothering Lance Armstrong with a pillow or anything, but he did get tired of her awfully quickly.
From his angle, it was said that Kate was always bringing her son Ryder with them everywhere, and was turning dates into “family” activities. A source close to Lance said that Kate came off as needy and that she always needs a man in her life.
From her angle, he knew that she’s a single mother when he became involved with her. I think that’s all I can really say in her defense. She could’ve gotten a babysitter so that the two of them could’ve spent some quality time together alone. Maybe little Ryder was asking questions of marriage to Lance, albeit put up to it by his daddy Chris Robinson? Nahhhh.
I wouldn’t put it past him, though, considering Kate ran back to him (they were caught smooching) after Lance gave her the boot.
http://snarkerati.com/celebrity-gossip/kate-hudson-was-smothering-lance-armstrong/
I'll always wonder why Heath and Naomi didn't stay together. I know some rumors about it, but we can never know for sure what really went on. Naomi is a beautiful woman and a real class act.
I can't stand Kate Hudson. She is extremely annoying. I don't get how Jake could be friends with an asshole like Lance anyway.
Jake wanted a part and may have had a crush on Lance.
Crush or no crush, I bet Jake and Lance had great time in Paris.
July 2006
Jake, Lance, Matthew, Tour de France, Jake G Livestrong bike...
Jake Watch - July 2006
I bet Jake had a hell of lot more fun in Paris with Lance than Reese.
Seems like when everyone thought Jake was gay they loved him. Now that he is straight and with Reese nobody gives a damn. Except Disney.
Weird thing about Disney. Its ok that their female clients are underage and trampy but their male clients no matter what age must not be gay.
Sex sells. Gay male sex is a big NO-NO.
I can't stand Lance, I've always thought he's a huge douche.
Why, what did he do?
Armstrong seems pretentous, arrogant and full of himself.
Posted on OMG - About cute blond guy in the park (Paris):
Just looked a little harder at that pic on ihj, and man does Jake perk up and look as if a 4 course meal is being served up. It was a gawking kind of stare with lips parted.
---
There was photo caption of the Jake pic staring at the guy in DCForum where Reese asks "What do you see in him that you don't see in me?" and Jake says "My dick!"
^^^
UltraViolet loved it! LOL
Anonymous said...
Armstrong seems pretentous, arrogant and full of himself.
What superstar athlete in todays world is not.
Say what you want about Lance but what he does to raise money for Cancer research is heroic. Lance seems to have dedicated his life to finding a cure for Cancer. I applaud him.
I need to see that picture does anyone have the link? Thanks.
"Say what you want about Lance but what he does to raise money for Cancer research is heroic. Lance seems to have dedicated his life to finding a cure for Cancer. I applaud him."
Ok, that is something positve about him. Maybe he's not that bad after all. ;)
4:26 PM
Cute blond guy in the park? I think it's this one:
http://www.iheartjakemedia.com/displayimage.php?album=1237&pos=12
P.S. I can't be sure because I didn't see that DC forum caption.
does anyone know if the gossip on the Brothers set about Jake "jokingly" posting a picture of Heath in his prison cell was true, false or in the barrel?
I think it's true and that he did it for a few cheap laughs.
Oh my God that guy is gorgeous. You can bet your butt Jake's heart rate increased when he saw him. I don't think Austin will be too happy seeing this pic.
Men are visual animals.
I'll always wonder why Heath and Naomi didn't stay together. I know some rumors about it, but we can never know for sure what really went on.
Spill it out.
????????
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1040920/Walk-The-Line-Reese-Witherspoon-walk-aisle.html
Oh well, even if they marry, it won't last.
‘He told me he had proposed several times but she kept telling him she wanted to give their relationship more time. When he asked her again a couple of weeks ago, she finally said yes.’
So that's why Reeke were so happy in London and Paris! LOL
Well, I guess that means the Vineyard's out as a location then? ;)
Ah, Jake is such a romantic, he talks about Reese all the time and to everyone on the set. LOL
And where's the bling? That's the big missing element. ;)
Posted on OMG
Ryan Phillippe and Abbie Cornish secretly engaged
http://celebrities-portal.com/news/ryan-phillippe-and-abbie-cornish-secretly-engaged
Spill it out.
Supposedly it didn't have anything to do with him not being ready to be a dad. Heath wanted kids, but he didn't want to marry her, he didn't believe in marriage. He supposedly liked to flirt too, which Naomi didn't like, understandably. They split. Then along came Michelle and for Naomi, her now husband and father of her child Liev. Naomi and Heath supposedly remained friends.
Yeah, right! LOL
Well the truth is PoP isnt going to come out for two years. This means something has got to give. They can't go on the way they are. They are either going to have to split or get married. It is good business. The problem I see for Reese is that she is gonna look like a real loser when the truth comes out that Jake is gay and she is jilted for a guy.
Thanks 6:12 PM.
You're welcome 6:33.
Teen Choice 2008 airs Monday, Aug. 4 (8:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX.
I'll be sure to miss it. ;)
Michelle strikes me as a "easy to get" type of woman from what I've read about her before and after she was with Heath.
Wasn't there a story about Michelle cheating on Heath on the set of "Incendiary" with Ewan McGregor (sp?). I remember reading it on some British gossip site. She still was pretty much with Heath then.
If Reese wasn't such a bitch like many say and if I knew for sure that Jake is straight, Reese wouldn't be that bad of a partner for him.
Yes, she would be a bad partner.
I'm still waiting for the engagement on her b'day & the father's day pics with her kids?? Dec 19 will come & pass.....and it will be who believes the tabloids? hahah? like they said at the Rendition premier.
No news days, gotta keep the public entertained!!
And I'm still waiting for the Tom&Kate party pictures.
well the vineyard's really iced in in December - WTF! -
wake me up when this is over!
Posted on OMG:
PR knows that if they want Reeke in the press week after week then they have to give them different angles on essentially the same story. So we get all the nonsense about moving in or Atticus with the ring or the rehash of the marriage rumours again and again.
The fauxmance is a delicate plant that needs constant watering.
7:28 AM. Thank you for the DGA picture. You are a prince(ss). And heLLO little Jake. ;)
"Michelle Williams and Spike Jonze first met in 2006 when Michelle auditioned for his film of the Maurice Sendak children’s book “Where The Wild Things Are”. Williams was offered the part in the movie, but later withdrew from the film.
Last year Michelle and Spike finally worked together on Synecdoche, New York in the summer of 2007, and struck up a friendship. At the time Williams was still dating Heath Ledger."
Michelle
^^ Heathus could not be fettered. If Michelle hadn't gotten preggers, it would have been another on-set romance that eventually faded out. He tried to make it work for Matilda, Matilda, Matilda.
Either the condom broke or she did'nt use protection, and that includes the pill.
A woman Michelles's age should know better, unless she trapped Heath. what woman in this day and age does'nt even consider the possibilities? In any case we have little Matilda, a beautiful little girl Heath adored. I read somewhere that Naomi wanted kids, he did'nt and that's why they broke up. I'm sure there's more to the story, but Heath probably was'nt ready to get tied down just yet. Go figure.
11:06 & 2:11 ITA
I suppose someone will show up at the airport with a tux and buttoneer and inform Jake Gyllenhaal that he's gettin married. Is he not abroad somewhere? If it's true this otta be SOME bachelor party eh? All those MEN?
I really don't get it. I've heard or read everyone has announced his engagement ...except him and Reese.It's interesting what's being said , but it's more interesting and intriguing what's NOT being said by the *ultra-private* "couple". I suspect the hemhawing around the question will begin when the next film promotion starts, when Leno or somebody alludes to his upcomimg nupituals.
Soon she'll have him wearing (tourist daddywear) white socks with sandals and plaid shorts, roaming LA beaches with a coin finder, voting for Mcain and wallowing in southern right-wing politics.. Yikes!!! He's lost his mind. We'll see.
Soon she'll have him wearing (tourist daddywear) white socks with sandals and plaid shorts, roaming LA beaches with a coin finder, voting for McCain and wallowing in southern right-wing politics. Yikes!!! He's lost his mind. We'll see.
Gah, you read my mind, Anon. 5:11! I've been thinking along these lines ever since I read the marriage rumor.
He and/or his people obviously do not want sexy as part of his image any more, but family man, and have gone to great lengths to promote that, either to offset gay rumors, because of PoP, or because it's true and they want to incorporate it into his image with as little damage as possible. They've done such a good job that now I have trouble separating the two of them in my mind. I do not find other women's husbands and children's father figures sexy, but off limits. It's just how I see it. It's very admirable and worthy of respect, but not sexy. For some actors, it's different because their wives/families are not so prominently displayed in the forefront of their lives, but in Jake's case, they seem to be joined at the hip. Some actors are already married when they start to become "it" guys, but Jake was single, and his image was different, so this is a change. A shame, really, for one so attractive to be de-sexed and made so conservative at his young age. It's disappointing that it's such a vapid woman. :(
Ten'll get ya twenty that this week's 6-page spread in OK, Star, People, or US Weekly will have the headline "She Said Yes!".
Come on guys, Jake isn't going to marry the bitch.
I keep wondering what Maggie and Naomi think about all this situation. If Jake is bearding, it must break their hearts to see their little boy who has to lead a double life and literally sell himself to get a career and a status of an A-lister.
If Jake is with Reese, I wonder what they think of her because Maggie seems to be so different from Reese and Naomi has always been very protective of her son. He is a mommy boy, but, for some reason, like it. I think Jake has a pretty intense relationship with his mother. I wonder if she likes Reese, what she thinks about a pair of grandchildren she got herself as a bonus to Ramona.
I don't see him with his family anymore and it's weird. I only remember Naomi from the Brothers screening.
I agree about "de-sexing" Jake's image but I think it happens to many actors as time passes by. Boys become men, men become fathers, etc. You just move on. Unless you're George Clooney;)
I agree about "de-sexing" Jake's image but I think it happens to many actors as time passes by.
PR and Jake is selling different image.
Ted and Lisa said that old Jake is alive and well, I hope they are right.
Unless you're George Clooney.
You're right - George has managed to stay sexy for years, and he's even more sexy when he's behind the camera making great films. :)
Of course, Jake is entitled to a private, personal life and more power to him for it. But, moviegoers are entitled to think and feel the way they want as well, as irrational as it may be. Nobody said you could have it all in life. A romantic lead, to me, is something different than I can get at home - in reality, you marry a guy with stability, one who is good father material and family-oriented, and the tradeoff is sometimes the excitement, spontaneity and wildness of a slightly bad boy, or it may have been there but disappears over time because it's just not conducive to raising a family where stability, planning and routine is needed. A regular actor you might not think of all of these things, but a romantic leading man conjures up images of fantasy, and boring married man and father in plaid shorts, socks and sandals at the barbecue doesn't do it for me, sorry! ;)
Why would we care about Reese's kids?
Why do you think Reeke would marry? Ever heard of PR, gossip, rumors?
"According to a source on the PoP set."
Give me a break, just more Reeke PR and gossip, there've been marriage rumors since January.
There is no reason to believe Jake would take the fauxmance so far to actually marry the bitch.
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