Tuesday 29 January 2008

The Cruel and Unusual Replies Have It

Dear Ted:
I just added egomaniacal Eddie Murphy to the list of people whose movies and shows I will not watch. He joins Rosie O'Donnell, Russell Crowe, Oprah and Tom Cruise. But here's why I am writing—Eddie Murphy is Toothy Tile, right? God knows he's Toothy.
Jeane
Walnut Creek, California

Dear Blacklisting Betty:
Eddie, Rosie, Russell and Tom aren’t too surprising celebs to leave a bad taste in people’s mouths. But what in heaven’s name do you have against Mama O? I’d think at least the cast of The Hills would wind up on a blacklist before Oprah. In any case, Eddie deserves a smart punch in his smilies, but he ain’t no Toothy.

* * *

Dear Ted:
I want to let you know I am currently on my deathbed and will be long gone before Toothy Tile is ever revealed. Can you just tell me? I will not reveal it to anyone!
Amy
Richmond, Virginia

Dearly Beloved:
My lips will be sealed at your wake. I'll bring a casserole, though!

Source: Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth and The Awful Express

10 comments:

  1. I hope that Ted continues to push the line that Jake and Heath were not close when Heath died, and that we should not cannonize Heath.

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  2. Ted mentioned that Jake and Heath were not close when Heath died ?

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  3. Jackie, please let us know @ OMG if you need anything. Starting a blog is not easy.

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  4. Thanks Wicked, I'll shout if I need help! :)

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  5. In any case, Eddie deserves a smart punch in his smilies, but he ain’t no Toothy.


    Not at all sure what this means. Does anyone have any idea?

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  6. I just added egomaniacal Eddie Murphy to the list of people whose movies and shows I will not watch.

    I think Ted just agreed with "egomaniacal Eddie Murphy" part (deserves a smart punch in his smilies) and answered the question (he ain’t no Toothy).

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  7. Posted on OMG

    Jake Gyllenhaal High School Yearbook

    School plays and disco club.

    ONTD

    Top Socialite

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  8. He is so much better looking now then he was then. I just saw Good Girl and October Sky. He was not attractive in either film. He wasn't even hot in Proof. And then *poof* (no pun intended), he just got hot after Jarhead. By Brokeback, he was completely beautiful.

    What happened? Did he just burn off the baby fat in Jarhead?

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  9. Brokeback Mountain was filmed during the summer of 2004 - Jarhead was filmed later.

    Proof - release date 5 Sep 2005
    Jarhead - release date 4 Nov 2005

    Some very cute boys don't turn into handsome men. It was just the opposite for Jake.

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  10. School plays and disco club.

    Well, it could be gayer - musicals and disco club. :)

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